A French Goat, a Spanish Goat and an American Goat Walk Into a Bar…

OK, there’s no punchline, just three fancy cheeses I am lovin’ on lately and think you guys should know about…

Like most Americans, the first 23 or so years of my life were dominated by cheese made from cows. Namely, cheddar, Swiss, American, and String.

Back before the snobby days of food blogs, I thought provolone and havarti were pretty damn fancy, and had no idea that cows were only the beginning. I was amazed to learn that sheep could produce something as phenomenal as pecornio romano, and I was dumbfounded when told that fresh mozzarella doesn’t come from cows at all, but from water buffalo.

Then, at some glorious point in my early post-collegiate life, I stumbled into a fancy-shmancy dinner party and discovered the wondrous beauty that is spun from the teat of a female goat. My life has not been the same since, as there is literally an entire world of soft, creamy, goat’s milk cheeses to be tasted. Here are three that have recently blown my mind, and my palate.

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Boucheron – This French goat’s milk cheese comes in a waxy rind that I have to say I’m not crazy about, but it surrounds a soft white middle that is rich, creamy and just a little bit sharp. Most importantly, this is a goat cheese that crumbles in your mouth, not in your hands. Unlike other crumbly goat cheeses and fetas, Boucheron isn’t just for salad – it can be easily spread on a cracker or just sliced and eaten solo.

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Nevat – Holy cow goat. This Catalaunian cheese, whose name is Spanish for ‘snowy,’ dares to be different. Nevat goes for the rich and creamy thing without bothering with the crumbles. The consistency is closer to Brie than most goat cheeses, but it still captures that tangy goat cheese thing with just a little bit of sweet thrown in.

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Humboldt Fog – I have no idea where California stands in the global cheese pantheon, but if this bad boy is any indication, the Golden State should be getting some serious cheese-loving props. Cypress Grove Chevre, the NoCal company that specializes in goat’s milk cheeses, sums up their signature offering as how: “an elegant, soft, surface ripened cheese. The texture is creamy and luscious with a subtle tangy flavor.” All true, but what they aren’t telling you is that this mofo is some stinky cheese. Seriously. As in hold your nose, put a bag over your head, and don’t inhale, stinky cheese. It’s also a smooth, buttery thing of beauty that should not be missed. (Props to Alison for the recommendation.)

Maybe You Shouldn’t Be Such a Hungry Man

hungry man

You know those Hungry Man commercials. It’s like, oh, only wussies eat salad or whatever. Okay, that was a bad impression, but I think you know what I’m talking about. The whole notion that MEN need a pound of food is sexist and unhealthy. Not to mention completely fucking wrong.

So it was nice to see Men’s Health feature the 20 worst foods found in restaurants, plus suggestions for alternatives. Vanity is in.

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Photo: Scritchy Pictures

Where My Peeps At?

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Over on our Facebook page earlier this week, Endless Simmer was ruminating about how excited we are for Peeps Season. (Of course you already know this if you are friends with us.)

Seriously though, how awesome is Easter? Jellybeans, Cadbury’s eggs, marshmallow peeps – it’s like Halloween but with Jesus. And this year, it comes extra early. Oh man, we must have been good this year or something.

Building on our excitement, JoeHoya wanted to make sure we knew the Washington Post runs an annual PEEPS DIORAMA CONTEST.

It’s OK, take a minute. I’m sure you’re staggering back with excitement the same way I was. Here are the details:

We want you to make a diorama of a famous occurrence or scene. It can be a historical, current or future event, or it can be a nod to pop culture. The main rule is that all the characters must be played by Peeps, those marshmallowy chicks and rabbits that start plaguing checkout lines in every grocery and convenience store this time of year….The winner will receive a $100 American Express gift check and a Peeps prize pack courtesy of Just Born, the company that owns the Peeps brand. Four runners-up will receive a $50 American Express gift check and a Peeps prize pack.

Let’s recap:

You get to make a diorama, for the first time since grade school, you have to incorporate peeps, you can win dollar bills, and “Extra credit may be given to deft use of puns in the concept or title.”

Oh it’s on.

Photo: WaPo

A Banana Only a Poor, Non-Profit Worker Could Love

I know, I know, believe it or not, I do have a day job. And it’s for a non-profit. So as much as I’d love to go out to eat at my fav places every night, or cook fantastic meals, sometimes I slum it.

Exhibit A:

ugly banana

Normally, I would have thrown that sucker out. But, I looked at it twice. As a thing of beauty. As a slice of life I shouldn’t waste. And so I mashed the banana up with some natural peanut butter** and created a creamy, and slightly chunky open faced sandwich. On wheat toast. With a side of ruffled plain potato chips.

pb and banana sand

**Holy crap. There are like a million different kinds of peanut butters. Or, I should say: NUT BUTTERS. So 80 and I are in Whole Foods selecting over-priced ingredients for our “V-daycelebration and I remember that I just ran out of peanut butter. (Hint, Hint – 80. This is your girlfriend nagging you to write up our Vday dinner.)

Now growing up in little ole Cherry Hill, New Jersey I only remember two kinds of PB – Jif and Peter Pan (I was a Jif girl.) And then I found out there was “chunky” which I thought was disgusting, as I hated peanuts (I’ve grown to like them since) and I didn’t want to acknowledge the fact that my beloved peanut butter was actually made from peanuts. Okay, I’ll reveal one more secret just so I can beat dad gansie to the punch: my elementary school lunch sandwich consisted of peanut butter on a hamburger bun. Period.

Okay, back to WF. Since I don’t frequent that grocer very often, I haven’t memorized the aisles so I had to ask where the PB was. I was swiftly corrected that I would be taken to the NUT BUTTER aisle. Anyway I get there and just fucking stare. Meanwhile, 80, who is itchin to get out of there at this point (he has his gourmet beer so he’s ready) is not super thrilled when he finds me open-mouthed and rummaging through: soy butter, soy peanut butter, almond butter, cashew butter, organic fill-in-the-blank nut butter, natural peanut butter, natural organic peanut butter and blah blah blah I’m going insane! I ended up just getting what I came for (10 minutes later) – natural peanut butter. Phew.

Hold up – one more Q – why is natural PB so funky in that the oil separates from the rest of the creaminess? JoeHoya? Anyone?

*Spoiler Alert*
And OMFG – I can’t believe the ending of this week’s LOST. The Baby!

Log Cabin Epicurians

log cabin

Happy President’s Day!

You might be wondering what the above photo has to do with POTUS Day, and if you are, blame it on your nursery school teacher. My mom manages 17 three year olds on a daily basis. And when I say manage I mean she sings with them, ties their shoes, leads circle time, helps them with crafts, feeds them snacks (NO PEANUTS!), and of course, teaches them. AKA – comes home with a headache every day.

Nursery school lessons are boiled down to the basics. (I won’t even get into the way they teach Thanksgiving.) Anyway, here is the tasty treat that the kiddies made to commemorate our very noble, very honest, very judicious country leaders.

And one note, every year dad gansie comes to my mom’s classroom to help out with this messiest and yummiest of crafts. I guess the children think my dad is the original G-Dubs.

Lincoln’s Log Cabin Republicans

Place a shoe box open side down and cover with aluminum foil.

dad gansie and pretzel
(dad gansie and unidentified pre-schooler)

With a plastic knife spread vanilla icing on all sides of a pretzel log. Stick on shoe box.

Bonus points: create windows and doors with broken pieces of pretzel.

Artsy Photo of the Day

gansie and chips BS and computer

Behind the scenes at ES

Costanza was Wrong

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I’m sure everyone remembers the extremely profound episode of Seinfeld that dealt with the sensitive issue of “double dipping.” Costanza gets in a fight when his girlfriend’s brother Timmy chastises him for dipping a chip in dip, taking a bite, and returning the bitten chip to the bowl for more dip.

A little disgusting but a little bit necessary, to re-dip or not to re-dip is a burning question we all face from time to time. One dip just can’t feasibly grab the correct ratio of chip to dip. You really need that second submersion to get two perfect bites of chip and dip, but unless you’re eating the whole bag by yourself at homeĀ  , there’s always that worry that someone at the party might be waiting to publicly out your double dipping. So what to do???

The answer you’ve been waiting for, after the jump.

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