New York’s Top 10 Outdoor Eating Spots

You may have noticed that in the past week or so, certain elements in the media establishment have been trying to convince you that summer is over. THIS IS A LIE. As I’m sure we all remember from 8th grade earth science, summer does not end until the autumnal equinox on September 22. Any attempts to claim that it is already time to get back to work, back in shape, or back to sober are just shamefully false. And most importantly, we’ve still got a good few weeks yet of prime outdoor eating time. So close down that spreadsheet and check out our list of New York’s Top 10 Outdoor Eating Spots.

10. Tree

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Some people say outdoor eating should be reserved for lighter fare, like summer salads or baguette slices and brie. To this I call BS. There’s nothing better than sitting outside and enjoying a full plate of  steak frites and a couple of bottles of Bourdeaux. Wedged between a deli and a barber shop, this narrow East Village French bistro is entirely missable from the sidewalk, but one of New York’s best-kept secrets is hidden in the back: the lush, ivy-lined patio garden.

190 1st Avenue, Near 12th Street, East Village
Tree on Urbanspoon

9. Harbor Lights

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South Street Seaport is generally a place New Yorkers like to avoid when not guiding out-of-towners around. But if you’re up for a little tourist-elbowing, it’s worth pushing your way past the mall crowds to this seafood palace serving freshly-caught oysters, clams, shrimp and lobster, along with the best views going of the Brooklyn Bridge and downtown Manhattan. Sure, it’s a cheesy postcard moment, but as those go, it’s as good as it gets.

Pier 17, 3rd Floor, South Street Seaport

8. New Leaf Cafe

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All the way on the other end of Manhattan, Washington Heights’ woodsy Fort Tyron Park is the setting for this quaint limestone building and garden cafe, which serves an upscale seafood menu featuring oysters on the half-shell and tuna tartare (hopefully nothing culled from the Hudson below). But the real draw is the view from up on the hill, with the towering Cloisters museum just next door and an expansive view of Upper Manhattan and the Bronx in the distance.

1 Margaret Corbin Drive, Fort Tyron Park, Washington Heights
New Leaf Café on Urbanspoon

7. Gowanus Yacht Club

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Photo: Semarr

Don’t let the stuffy name fool you: Smith Street may be home to Brooklyn’s toniest restaurants, but this summertime beer garden is a dirty beach bum’s dirty hipster’s paradise, complete with dirt cheap burgers and hot dogs, and the added lure of Styrofoam cups of beer starting at one dollar.

323 Smith Street, at President Street, Cobble Hill

6. A60

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New Yorkers of all stripes discovered a new pastime this summer: figuring out ways to sneak into this exclusive rooftop patio at the 60 Thompson hotel. Techniques for gaining access to this members-only lounge include shelling out for a room key, finding a hotel-guest date in the second-floor lounge, or showing up on weekdays before seven, when the rooftop is open to all.

60 Thompson Street, near Broome Street, Soho

Next: Top 5 of New York’s Outdoor Eating Spots


Eats of Glory: Top Ten Olympic Foods

As you probably know if you aren’t living under an extraordinarily large rock, it’s Olympics time! Around here, that means one thing: Carb-loading. No, we’re not running the Olympic marathon, we’re merely preparing to stuff our faces while watching the Dream Team play inexplicably mediocre basketball, witness 15-year-old Russian girls twist themselves into unnatural positions, and see athletes from around the globe keel over from pollution inhalation. Now that’s gonna take some serious energy. On our part. Can we say take-out? Here’e a look at our Top Ten Olympic Carb-Loading Foods:

10. Toasted Ravioli
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Photo: Dyobmit

The Italians may think they have a leg up on the competition with their gigantic pasta dishes, but we Americans took their pasta and made it our own. How? By breading it and deep-frying it, of course! The St. Louis chefs who invented this tastiness get bonus points for the creatively misleading naming. No one would be crazy enough to order something called fried, breaded ravioli. But toasted ravioli? Sign us up.

Estimated Carbs: 85 grams

9. Fried Chicken and Waffles

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Photo: LWY

Who says carb-loading means you gotta give up meat? This Harlem classic gives you all the protein you need, and doesn’t skimp on the sugar. A giant waffle topped with fried chicken, gobs of syrup and butter. Can I get some toast with that?

Estimated Carbs: 100 grams

8. Cinnabon

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Photo: Cinnabon

What exactly is in a Cinnabon cinnamon roll, anyway? The official story is “warm dough filled with our legendary Makara cinnamon and topped with freshly made cream cheese frosting.” Now, I think we’ve all tasted cinnamon, dough and cream cheese before, and we know that Cinnabon tastes like none of these things. Every bite is so full of powerful, artificial sugar-y stuff that it’s hard to imagine how they get so much sickly-sweetness into such a small space. However they do it, they deserve an award.

Estimated Carbs: 115 g

7. Pina Colada

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Photo: dlisbona

The great thing about mixing cocktails is you can always use a little less of the sweet stuff if you’re counting carbs. Unless you’re using exclusively sweet stuff, of course. Aaaah, the pina colada, a.k.a. adult candy in a glass. Start with a healthy dose of Malibu coconut rum (the kind that smells/tastes like sunblock), and mix with coconut cream and pineapple juice. Top that with a maraschino cherry and a wedge of pineapple. You should be in a coma for the rest of the Olympics.

Estimated Carbs: 120 g

6. Baked Ziti Pizza

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Photo: NYPD Pizza

You gotta love watching tourists come into New York pizzerias as their faces go “mmm…oh that looks nice…ok….interesting…WHAT THE HELL IS THAT?” And that’s when you know they’ve caught site of the baked ziti pizza. What a delicious and completely unnecessary invention. Hey, sometimes you can’t decide between pizza and pasta and you just want to eat an entire serving of pasta on top of a plate of pizza. What’s so wrong with that?

Estimated Carbs: 140 g

Next: Top 5 Olympic Foods

E is for Endless Excellence

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Good News! The Milwaukee Cupcake Queen (who you may remember from her winning bacon cupcakes) recently named us one of her ten Excellent Blogs. The idea of the Excellent Blog Awards is we’re supposed to pass the E along to ten of our favorite bloggers, which sounds like a great way to share some very hott links with you all. So here are ten of our current favs:

– An absurd look at the world of food, So Good has the lowdown on anything that’s happening in the world of food media. He’s the guy who broke the LeBron James/Papa Johns scandal and the hilarious Kraft cheese MySpace debacle.

– Have you noticed that I like Bacon? Heather over at Bacon Unwrapped reeeeally likes bacon.

– Can’t get enough JoeHoya in your life? Everyone’s favorite know-it-all commenter now has his own food blog, with his wife, JaneHoya Elizabeth. Check out Capital Spice.

Anthony Bourdain’s blog may be corporate-hosted, but The Travel Channel leaves him as we like him: uncensored and nasty.

– If you’re as obsessed with food TV as we are, you shouldn’t miss a post from TV Food Fan.

Read More

The BS Top 10

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Happy Birthday, BS!

Here is a “Top” list just for you.

Top 10 Reasons Why ES Loves BS

10. Ability to incorporate pine nuts into anything. [Pine Nuts Tag]
9. Breaking the news that he scored a girlfriend through an ES post. [Alex, meet BS’s Mom]
8. Seriouisly, there is such a thing as Hot Dog Sushi. [Sushi?]
7. Bridging the divide between G-d’s Chosen People and Jesus Lovers. [Christmas Matzah Balls]
6. Creating the wildly popular *Top 10* Contents (see #5). [Top 10s]
5. Link-whoring us all the way to the New York Times (and USA Today and Sports Illustrated.) [American Invents Crazy Food]
4. Exposing the dirty practice of charging for chips and salsa. <gasp> [Getting a Chip Off My Shoulder]
3. Padma. Padma. Padma. [Padma]
2. Bacon. Bacon. Bacon. [Bacon]
1. Taking ES from the blogosphere to the airwaves. I hear Oprah calling. [Sports Radio]

The Top 10 Foods Only America Could Have Invented

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Photo: Emdot

When it comes to food, America gets a bad rap. It’s a common refrain that America has no cuisine to call our own. We’ve got apple pie and hot dogs, but that’s about it. (And when you really get down to it, the Germans invented hot dogs, and the British were eating apple pie like 1,000 years ago.)

But the truth is, America does have a cuisine to call it’s own. Over the past 232 years we’ve invented some of the most creative, daring, and yes, downright craziest dishes the world has ever seen. Sure, they can be overly greasy, a little too cheesy, and sometimes fried a few times too many. But they’re ours. So to celebrate Independence Day, we’ve put together this list of the best foods that only a country with just the right combination of greed, grit, and gluttony could have possibly dreamed up.

The Top Ten Foods Only America Could Have Invented:

10. Corn Dog
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Photo: Intangible Arts

In 1942, at a beautiful place called the Texas State Fair, an industrious young man named Neil Fletcher came up with a way to make his hot dogs sell quicker: dip them in corn meal, deep fry ’em, and pop ’em on a stick. And so an American tradition was born. Every year, as the weather turns warmer and state fair season comes around, Americans say to themselves: what can we deep fry next? We’ve deep fried twinkies, oreos, hamburgers, even coca-cola. But all of these wondrous achievements owe a debt to the original food that really didn’t need to be battered and fried but just had to be: the corn dog.

9. Philly Cheesesteak
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Photo: x-eyedblonde

Only Philadelphia, the most American of all cities, could invent an iconic sandwich and then vehemently insist that there shall be no attempts to make it good. Crappiest ingredients only, please. Pennsylvania Governor Ed Rendell explained problems non PA-ers have when trying to make cheesesteaks: “First, they use good meat. You need the fattiest, stringiest meat to get a proper taste.” The second mistake, of course, is that you’ve got to use Cheese Whiz; no real cheese allowed. Rendell insists this is became “real cheese doesn’t melt,” which is of course a lie. But never matter. The Philly Cheesesteak is delicious. Would it be more delicious if it were made with thinly slice Kobe steak and melted Gruyere? Of course it would be. But it wouldn’t be as amazing.

8. “Chinese Food”
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Photo: VirtualEm

One of the great things about American cuisine is that when we come up with something so outrageous that even we can’t stand behind it, we figure out a way to pin it on someone else. Case in point: “Chinese Food.” All across America, Chinese buffets offer endless arrays of beautiful, deep-fried, grease-soaked food. General Tso’s chicken, chop suey, egg rolls, chow mein, fortune cookies. What do all these dishes have in common? They were all invented in America. Seriously people, do you really think Chinese people eat this crap? No. They eat rice. With vegetables and maybe a little meat. And it’s not battered or fried, or double fried, or double battered, and it’s certainly not filled with cheese. I mean, crab rangoon? Come on, that stuff has imitation crab meat and cream cheese. It could only have been invented in one place, and I think you know where that is.

7. S’mores
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Photo: Phil Hawksworth

It’s difficult to say exactly how s’mores became so popular throughout America. Graham crackers are not particularly well-liked, and neither are marshmallows. We generally do not enjoy eating things that were cooked on a stick our little brother just found in the dirt, nor do we usually like to burn our food to a crisp before dinnertime. Yet somehow, s’mores just work. Despite their cutesy contraction of a name, and the fact that we have to actually cook and assemble them ourselves, rather than order them from a fast food window, I’ve yet to meet a person who does not love s’mores. Except for foreigners, who will look at you like you are the craziest person ever if you try to explain what a s’more is.

6. Reuben Sandwich
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Photo: kimberlykv

This fully-loaded sandwich may seem like an international delicacy, but the reuben is as American as it gets. Start with pastrami–a meat so infused with spices that it has more flavor in a single bite than most full meals. Pile this sky-high, preferably using at least a pound of meat per sandwich. Add on some “swiss” cheese–a bland, hole-y cheese that no actual Swiss person would ever touch. Top it off with “Russian dressing,” a beautiful orange mayonnaise concoction that–you guessed it–hasn’t a thing to do with Russia.

Next: Top 5 Foods Only America Could Have Invented

Top Ten Moments in ES History: Year One

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Endless Simmer is one year old today! Can you freaking believe that? It seems like only yesterday we were brainstorming pun names and telling our friends about this hypothetical “blog” thing. It’s been a pretty amazing year, and we really appreciate all our readers coming along for the ride. If you’ll allow us just this one post of self-indulgence, we’d like to take a minute to relive the Best Moments in ES History: Year One. For our long-time fans, enjoy a walk down memory lane, and for newbies, check out some of our all-time fav posts that you may have missed.

10. Gansie gets drunk; invents live blogging Top Chef

During Season 3 of Top Chef, Endless Simmer provided you with next-day recaps, as many other blogs do. But on one Wednesday night this Winter, gansie wandered home from the pub, discovered Top Chef 4 was about to premier, and decided our readers just couldn’t wait until Thursday morning for our must-read insight. Thus a new genre was born: live-blogging pre-recorded episodes of reality television shows. In the beginning, it was just gansie informing a non-existent audience that “Padma’s boots are to die” and “Spike could be hott,” but by the end of the season, we were welcoming huge groups of readers and even saw some celebrity guest lurkers (see moment #3). Stay tuned to ES and who knows what totally unnecessary innovation we’ll come up with next. I think I hear a clamor for Live Blogging Iron Chef America, Live Blogging Sunday Night Dinner Parties, and Live Blogging Repeats of Rachael Ray’s Tasty Travels at 3am

9. JoeHoya’s first comment

On July 6th, 2007, at 12:30 a.m., we were overjoyed to find we had one of our very first comments from a non-friend/family member. It was a classic: “Does it make me just a little bit more of a foodie than you if I know that it’s spelled “bulgur” wheat? And does it make me an ass that I bothered to post that?” In fairness, he concluded the comment “And, now that you hate me, can I also say that this is a great new blog that I’m looking forward to visiting frequently!” He wasn’t kidding. And so an ES star commenter was born. The next year would be filled with friends and family repeatedly asking us: “Who the hell is JoeHoya? And why does he know everything?” Thank you, JoeHoya; no other ES commenter has even come close.

8. “I am going to cut that girl”

Our first brush with stardom came a mere month into our blogging tenure, when the prettier half of our editing team was mysteriously nominated in Fishbowl D.C.’s annual hottest media types contest. Realizing the huge marketing potential of such a moment, we quickly started talking shit about gansie’s competition. In the most dramatic moment of said shit-talking, the frontrunning “hottest media type” got a little angry at our joke that she was clearly cheating, ruminating on her own blog that she was “going to cut that girl who called me a cheater.” Thankfully, no one was cut, and for the record, it turned out she actually was cheating.

7. Padma Lakshmi reads ES every day

OK fine, that might be an exaggeration. Just a little. But it’s kinda-sorta-possibly true. A few months back, a good friend of our contributor britannia ended up interning for a Manhattan publicist that does work for ES Icon Padma Lakshmi. When the publicist asked him to print out blog posts about Padma for the star to read, he of course mentioned that he knew the folks writing Endless Simmer. “Oh yeah, we’ve read them before,” replied Padma’s PR flack. So for all of you who comment not-so-nice things about this extremely talented chef, curb it, OK, because Padma is always watching.

PS – Hi Padma!

6. 80 proof gets a new camera

We were fairly proud of our first five months of blog posts, but 80p def took us to a new, semi-profess level when he started snapping pics with his new Christmas-bestowed camera. Sure we were snarky before, but now we’re artsy too. A blogosphere-world double whammy.

Next: Top 5 Moments in ES History: Year One

March Madness: America’s Top 10 Drunk College Foods

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With the NCAA basketball tournament tipping off this afternoon, America’s brightest young minds are poised to spend the next month doing what they do best: getting drunk and yelling at television screens. When all the blood, sweat, tears – and beer – are swept off the court, the nation’s 18 million college students will be left in search of one thing: some grease to soak it all up.

While you were finalizing your bracket picks, Endless Simmer carefully evaluated the tournament field to compile this list of the tournament’s Top 10 Colleges – ranked by the drunk food they have to offer their hungry, hungry students. Eat that, U.S. News and World Report.

10. University of Wisconsin – Mac ‘n Cheese Pizza
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Photo: J&J Blog

Oh maaaan, I need some pizza. Cheesy pizza. Mmmm, cheese. No, wait, I want mac and cheese. Oooh! Pizza with mac and cheese on top! That’s what I want.

If you have ever said or heard a statement like this, you are almost certainly a drunk college student. Also, you probably live in Wisconsin.

The Badgers may have been dissed by the selection committee (29-4 can’t get you a no #2 seed??) but Wisconsin never was as good at sports as they are at creative use of cheese. Madison drunks flock to Ian’s Pizza for this gooey, magnificent creation that just couldn’t come from any other state.

9. Rutgers – Fat Darell
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Photo: AP

Don Imus’ not-so-favorite team is back in the women’s tourney as a Number 2 seed, while the Rutgers men were sent packing after a miserable season at the bottom of the Big East.

But don’t feel too bad for the Scarlet Knights – they can always console themselves back on campus with a Jersey summer full of Fat Darrells, a behemoth of a sandwich that solves the drunk’s eternal dilemma of “Do I want chicken fingers, mozzarella sticks, or French fries?”

The answer: a resounding “all three,” piled high on a sub role and topped off with marinara sauce. I’d tell you more about it but I’m a little short of breath and I feel a painful shooting sensation in my arm.

8. Purdue – The Duane Purvis All-American
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Photo: Flick User Horsepj

You can be forgiven if you didn’t know the name of Purdue’s All-American half-back/full-back from their undefeated 1932 football team. But you should damn well know the burger that bears his name.

The Triple XXX Family Restaurant in West Lafayette, Indiana serves up this decidedly unwholesome Boilermaker classic: 100% sirloin patty with lettuce, tomato, pickle, Spanish onions, and….wait for it…peanut butter. Only a drunk or Elvis – perhaps only a drunk Elvis – could fully appreciate this brilliance.

7. University of San Diego – Filiberto’s Carne Asada Burrito
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Photo: Flickr user buckofive

The San Diego Toreros may not be a household name – in fact, if you google the phrase University of San Diego team, the first hit is the school’s mock trial club. Scroll down to the bottom of the results page to find the bball squad, who shocked favorites Gonzaga and St. Mary’s to steal the WCC title and a berth in the big dance this year.

But that’s not what has these young fellows so excited; they’re just pumped up about this steak-filled beauty. USD students have shown the dirt cheap, gigantic burritos from Filiberto’s so much love that the chain has expanded to towns throughout Cali and Arizona, but U Study Drunk loyalists still swear by the original.

6. University of Pittsburgh – The South Side Slope
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Photo: Roadfood.com

For some reason, Polish cuisine has never quite caught on in the United States. And that reason is the simple fact that it doesn’t come between two slices of bread.

Pitt saloon Fatheads has a solution to this problem, and its name is the South Side Slope. A giant kielbasa topped with fried pierogies, grilled onions, American cheese and something called horsey sauce. Don’t ask, just eat.

Next: Top 5 America’s Top Drunk College Foods

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