by forkitude
Menu
Breakfast
by tvff
(Actual TVFF Jr. ultrasound…the embellishments are artistic license)
No, I’m not pregnant. But Mrs. TVFF is, so I’ve become hyper-aware of dietary restrictions placed on women when they’re expecting. It’s amazing how much you can’t/shouldn’t eat. God forbid that something on the no-fly list make its way into your diet, and don’t even try to talk about it on those baby discussion boards, where you’ll be immediately branded an unfit mother if you so much as suggest that “sunny side up” is a valid option for your breakfast table.
So, since I’m at least somewhat responsible for Mrs. TVFF’s current condition, I thought it would be a good idea to solicit her thoughts on what she’s been missing the most during the first 36 weeks and share it with you. Obvious disclaimer: I’m not a doctor, so please don’t take this as medical advice.
10. Booze
Who doesn’t like a good stiff drink at the end of a hard day’s work? Well, let me tell you this: Nobody could use a double martini more than a woman who has been dragging around an extra 25 pounds all day. Later in the pregnancy, it’s apparently kosher for you to have a half glass of wine with dinner, but that’s cold comfort for someone who would benefit from a bender.
9. Undercooked eggs
This one should come as no surprise to ES-ers, but we like a nice runny egg once in a while in the TVFF household. And we both love spaghetti carbonara (even if it doesn’t turn out perfectly), so it’s a minor tragedy that this one has been off the menu since May. Also, having to portion the scrambled eggs in the pan and scoop out my share invariably leads to a messy countertop and overcooked eggs in the end. Can’t wait until we can go back to playing salmonella roulette on a regular basis!
8. Sushi
This is the one area where I’ve decided to show some solidarity with the wife. I’ve gone 36 weeks without raw fish, and it’s starting to get really annoying. She knew better than to ask me to give up drinking for nine months. I love her and all, but let’s be real. To tide us over, she opts for the California roll from the her usual NYC lunch spot and I’ve relegated myself to a somewhat palatable Trader Joe’s faux-sushi, but it only makes us want the real stuff that much more.
7. Rare Meat
Some women profess a craving for meat during pregnancy, though Mrs. TVFF was much more interested in fresh fruit. Regardless, the done-ness of the meat that we are eating has proven to be an issue. She has steered (no pun intended) away from overly rare steaks and burgers, but the big headache has been chicken. Look, I’m not suggesting you eat your chicken at anything less than “done,” but I don’t like that I’ve been turned into an obsessive food safety inspector due to my zeal to prevent any kind of infection.
6. Caffeine
This poor woman can hardly keep her eyes open past 10:00 p.m. and yet she’s forced to studiously consult Starbucks’ Web site to make sure she isn’t going a few milligrams above her daily allotment.
Next: Top 5 Worst (Foodie) Things About Being Knocked Up
by gansie
My boyfriend and I traveled around Arizona for the last few days. We were invited for a wedding (Hi Mrs. Gaul!) in Rio Verde, but decided to take spend extra time in the state, mostly to delay that almost-five-hour flight back. We first ate dinner in Scottsdale (yes to Buffalo Carpaccio at Cowboy Ciao) and then stayed at a hotel/casino in Fort McDowell, which is built on tribal land. We then drove north to Sedona to visit my cousins and then north again and hiked about a mile into the Grand Canyon.
As this is a food blog, I won’t bore you with the beauty of the red rocks in Sedona and the pure fucking insanity that is the Grand Canyon (I think I said “What the fuck?!” every few steps.) I will, however, let you know my limited dining choices. I say choices because the options were not limited. We just chose the same thing over and over again.
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by forkitude
Homework sucks. Call it burn-out from sixteen years of school. Call it A.D.D.
Nevertheless, I admit to munching on high-sugar kid’s cereal for something to do and wonder: we really ate this for breakfast when we were kids?? No wonder we begged for it, crying and screaming in the grocery store aisles–this shit is freakin’ candy. The cinnamon sugar is coating my fingers and my laptop keyboard.
Wendell, Bob, and Quello (WTF?), the Cinnamon Toast Crunch bakers, certainly did know how to market sugar to children. Like giving candy to a baby…literally. And how noble of them to use “less sugar” than “other kids’ cereals.” There were cereals with more sugar??
Bob and Quello were fired somewhere along the way, and Wendell has been left to grace the box alone. And now, to entice the kids during modern, less-than-stellar Saturday morning cartoonage, the crazy cinnamon sugar squares just eat each other and burp. Nice.
What was your favorite high-sugar kids’ cereal? You know, the one that made you bounce off the walls in school and then crash around 10 AM. You know, the one that was partially responsible for your A.D.D…
