Philly - - Page 9

by gansie

Brass Monkey, That Phunky Phillie

I know what you’re thinking: Why is gansie’s friend Comack holding a Colt 45 bottle filled with an orange liquid — doesn’t Colt 45 look like piss?

Yes, my friends. I’ve recently learned a new way to both consume malt liquor and celebrate the Phillies. In case you weren’t aware, the 2008 World Fucking Champs are now facing the Dogers for the National League Championship Series. And there’s some drinkin’ to be had. Responsible drinking, of course. Responsible drinking in the form of vitamin C and a 40.

Brass Monkey
Unscrew the cap of the Colt 45. Pour out (into a cup—we don’t waste beer) until the curve of the bottle straightens into a column, basically where the label starts. Add orange juice. Chug. Go Phils.

by tvff

To Please the Mouth

Is there anything better than getting an amuse-bouche?

You sit down at the table, order your drinks and menu items and kick back and relax, thinking that your best-case scenario would be some freshly-baked bread and olive oil for dipping. Then, much to your amazement, out comes a small plate of deliciousness prepared by the kitchen especially to whet your taste buds. And you didn’t even have to ask!

I bring this up because it happened twice in the past few weeks. Mrs. TVFF and I were out and about in Philadelphia, seeing the sights, when we were able to snag an early seat at Chifa, a popular Peruvian/Chinese tapas bar. After ordering our five plates, out came a bowl of bite-sized pastries and a small dish of spreadable topping…manchego puffs with spicy guava butter. It was a highlight of the dinner and the meal itself hadn’t even started yet.

Then, the following weekend, we decided to take it easy after splurging and headed out to our neighborhood Italian place. We’re used to getting the complimentary bread and salad, but we were presented with a plate of grilled vegetables — cauliflower, green beans, peppers and more. Mrs. TVFF hardly put a dent in her pasta, having enjoyed the various appetizers along the way.

Hell, getting anything for free is great. (OK…I know it’s priced into the cost of the overall meal, but don’t burst my bubble.) But there is something more to the amuse that elevates it above the other freebies like the fortune cookie or starlight mint…

in Restaurants 1 comments

by tvff

A Spicy Sign of Autumn

Nothing gives me warm feelings of chilly fall nights like thinking about Sweetzels Spiced Wafers.

Growing up, you don’t process food intellectually, you just become accustomed to flavors of your life. You don’t think about what’s local and what’s seasonal and what’s traditional, you’re just happy to chow down on what’s put in front of you, so you absorb the traditions of countless previous generations until it becomes second nature. This is how the Philly region’s take on ginger snaps came to be a personal favorite, and one that is inseparably identified with the coming of autumnal chill.

Why do these simple cookies have such a hold on me? For one thing, they’re really tasty. The Wafers feature the perfect blend of sweetness and spice, evoking everything good about a pumpkin pie. Even better than the flavor is the incomparable texture. Many ginger snaps and spice cookies err too far on the side of chewiness or crispiness, but the Spiced Wafers find the perfect balance — like an al dente pasta cooked by a master chef.

And here’s the best part…if you have a glass of milk handy, you can make something unbelievable. Dunking these cookies is like playing a high-stakes game of chicken. Too long in the drink and they’re mush — breaking up and sinking to the bottom of your cup. Not long enough and it just feels “undercooked.” But if you can find the sweet spot — I’m guessing somewhere around five seconds — you’ll have a melt-in-the-mouth spiced dream.

But perhaps even more than the taste, they signal a season change: their Halloween-colored box comes with a punch-out cardboard mask. I’m working through my first box of the year right now, but a recent get-together with my family got my gears turning. How could I incorporate my new toy — the ice cream maker — with the Spiced Wafers to knock everyone’s socks off for dessert?

in Desserts 8 comments

by tvff

Cheflebrity Smörgåsbord: Hello, Joe!

BS’s recent mac & cheese article reminded me: There’s a Trader Joe’s opening about two miles from my house this Friday!

You probably think it’s funny that the mac jogged my memory, but it illustrates a bigger point about TJ’s, which is that I love shopping there despite the fact I’m not 100% sure the stuff there is head-and-shoulders better than my local supermarket.

For instance, they have an organic shells and cheese that uses the ubiquitous packet-o-cheeze powder, yet I feel so much better about eating it. Recently, there was the case of the canned tomatoes that I used for my quick marinara the other day. They were a bit tinny and kind of scrawny, with a bad tomato to juice ratio. I’ll be sticking with my Muir Glen.

And yet I just love shopping there, with the energetic, brightly-clad staff, copious samples and bell-ringing code that I can never quite decipher. And, hey…most of the stuff there is pretty good.

I’m excited about the new Princeton store despite the fact that I could literally throw a baseball from my desk at work and hit the TJ’s in Philly. The fact that I’ll no longer have to pack a fully-outfitted cooler in order to buy the frozen products has me downright giddy.

Now, if only I can convince them to change their mind and sell alcohol at the Princeton location, I’d be in heaven.

Free samples of smörg served by Hawaiian-shirted foodies below!

– Mario has some advice for the pharmaceutical industry? Oddly enough, it has nothing to do with his close contact with the pharmaceuticals traditionally used in large amounts to fuel kitchen staffs.

– From the ES “Been There, Done That” File: In 1995, former Russian President Boris Yeltsin tried to hail a cab in his underwear outside the White House because he wanted a pizza. He was drunk, of course. The difference is that Yeltsin had Secret Service there to wrangle him back inside whereas I had my equally drunk friends reminding me to bring them pepperoni.

After the jump, yet another reason to love that cuddly Brit on Top Chef and fresh news from some old adversaries.

in Celebs / Politics / TV 2 comments

by ML

Throw Me a Hot Dog, Ostrich Man

Several weeks ago I announced that the Reading Phillies minor league baseball team was holding Gluttony Night II. I was ecstatic. Tons of food. Pizza, ice cream, funnel cake galore. And if you’re at all familiar with minor league baseball, you won’t be surprised to hear that the Gluttony Night festivities were only a fraction of the very bizarre antics going down at the game.

First of all, I unfortunately missed the chance to drunk heckle a reality star and his children. Jon Gosselin plus eight minus Kate threw out the first pitch the night before Gluttony Night II. I should have sent a memo about all-you-can-eat french fries. But the Gosselins missed out, because Gluttony Night was an epic celebration of all things edible. Everything at this ballpark was about food. Everything.

Were there two private tent buffets in addition to Gluttony Night II? Yes.
Was there a “ROAST BEEF!” chant every time Kevin Mahar was up to bat because he was the Arby’s “RBI guy”? Yes
Was there a kid’s concession stand game, where small children representing pizza, a hot dog, and french fries raced around the field? Yes (and so wrong)
Was there a man riding an ostrich around the field, throwing hot dogs to the crowd, while a “hot dog for you!” song was playing? Yes, yes, yes.

The Crazy Hot Dog Vendor disturbed me the most, and after his little “performance” I promptly started pounding beers. At the bar we saw several young guys dressed up like pizza toppings. W. T. F.

All this craziness leads us to ask…We’ve already talked about the best major league baseball foods, but what about the minors? What are the tastiest, craziest, or straight up most disturbing foods you’ve seen served at minor league ballparks?

in Celebs 1 comments

by ML

Death to the Hoagie Man

Maybe I’m watching more television these days (well, what else are you supposed to do after college anyway?) but commercials over the last year or two have gotten increasingly annoying. I know nobody can forget the Lenten McDonald’s Filet-O-Fish jingle (GIVE ME BACK THAT FILLET-O-FISH, GIVE ME THAT FISH…sorry), or the YouTube fan rap turned commercial advertising McNuggets (who ISN’T into McNuggets, y’all?). And you can’t tell me you haven’t been to Subway for a Five Doollllaaaa Footlong .

But this time, WaWa has crossed the line…

in Restaurants / Sandwich / TV 7 comments

by BS

Top Chef Exit Interview: Episode 1

Top Chef is in Vegas this season and everything is HIGH STAKES. But one unlucky chef-testant didn’t even get to unpack. Our chat with them, after the jump…

in TV / Veggie 10 comments