Endless Simmer - A Food Blog

Editors Note: When ES commenter miked emailed me this terrible story of a young vineyard worker that died from poor working conditions, I immediately knew I wanted it on the blog. Sure, we fuck around all the time, but we also care greatly about what we put into our body — the politics of food and its journey to the table. The new tag, Garden Fresh, inspired by rooms’ posts is a small gesture in that direction. Thanks, miked, for reminding ES that once in a while there are more important things than bacon.

I mostly stopped drinking “Two Buck Chuck” (aka Charles Shaw) when I moved from California to DC and found that it costs like $3.99 here—just doesn’t have the same ring to it. Also, I think it started to taste more like kerosene (or maybe my palate became sophisticated enough to recognize its gassy bouquet).

Whether or not you still indulge in 2-buck, or patronize Trader Joe’s, you might be interested in the sad story of a 17 year-old farmworker, Maria Isabel Vasquez Jimenez, who died of heat stroke working in the Stockton, CA vineyard that grows the grapes for Charles Shaw wines.

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Cindy McCain, who is currently running to replace Laura Bush as First Robot, got in some trouble back in April when it was revealed that the “family recipes” appearing on her website were stolen from Rachael Ray and Giada. The McCain campaign suffered much mocking over this incident, and blamed an intern, who was subsequently fired. But apparently, the McCain folks still haven’t figured out how this whole googleplex thing works, because they’ve done the exact same thing again!

Family Circle Magazine is out with their potential first-lady cookie bake-off, and Cindy submitted an oatmeal butterscotch cookie recipe “from a friend.” What she didn’t mention is that the friend in question is named hersheys.com! Seriously, people, does no one have the Internet over at McCain headquarters? Isn’t there someone who can google Cindy’s recipes to make sure they aren’t plagiarized…again?

On a more positive note, Michelle Obama submitted a recipe for shortbread spiked with Amaretto and a little orange zest. Call me blinded by partisanship, but that actually sounds like a tasty idea!

Via: SoGood

Photo: Blind lemon larry

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When Hezbollah Tofu popped up on the scene a few months ago, we quipped that with Anthony Bourdain now occupied, Rachael Ray must be in search of a new nemesis. Well the queen of all B-list media hasn’t disappointed, nailing down a top-notch enemy: none other than right wing blogger Michelle Malkin.

Malkin is upset with RayRay’s latest Dunkin’ Donuts ad, but it’s not because she thinks sugar is making American kids obese (only nannying liberal ninnies would think something like that).

Michelle is upset because Rachael is shilling DD coffee while wearing a black and white paisley scarf that the Malkster points out looks almost like a keffiyah, the headwear previously popularized by such global celebrities as Lawrence of Arabia, Yasser Arafat, and um, Meghan McCain.

The keffiyah’s traditional role is to protect its wearer from the dessert sand and sun, although it has more recently become a symbol of solidarity with the Palestinian people. Oh, also, it’s just a fucking scarf.

As ridiculous as it is to suggest that the ad should be pulled because of RayRay’s neck accessories, it’s worth pointing out that Rachael Ray isn’t even wearing a keffiyah; she’s wearing a designer scarf. But to Malkin and others in search of terrorism at every corner, she might as well have changed her name to Rachael Hussein Bin Laden Ray.

Michelle Malkin demonstrates how much real Americans love donuts

Now we could all laugh this off as hilarious post-post-9-11 hysteria, expect for one rather disturbing fact: Dunkin’ Donuts has bowed to Malkin’s protest and pulled the ad in question!

You. Must. Be. Joking.

via SoGood

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Just letting you know, I’ve become Robert Novak. No, really. People now pay to reprint my writing. I know. Crazytown. So, watch out for a gansie coming to your local Onion…New York, Chicago, Wisconsin, Austin, Denver, Minnesota, San Francisco…

Oh, and I never read. This story for the Onion was quite a struggle and I severely bothered my friends over this feature.

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What used to be a way for suburban mothers to get out of the house has now evolved into a way for young, single 20-somethings to get out of the house. While book clubs may vary drastically in theme (feminist, history, Oprah), participants (co-workers, neighbors, Craigslisters), and fun (glass of wine, bottle of wine, bowl of marijuana), all book clubs rally around food.

Some book clubs meet at a centrally located restaurant where they can linger over dog-eared pages, drink from communal
pitchers, and let other people make the food—but that can lead to members spending more time contemplating the pages of a menu than those of their literature.

Instead, class up your next book-club gathering and create a meal based around your book choice. (Or, alternatively, choose your book around a meal.) Here are some fine page-plate pairings to get your literary and culinary mind in gear.

Ron Paul, The Revolution
w/ Broiled Steak and Chipotle Dipping Dauce

If you think hope is audacious, don’t care about villages, and are through trying to live up to daddy’s example, perhaps you’d be more interested in the political upheaval espoused by 10-term congressman and Republican presidential candidate Ron Paul. His The Revolution touts the glories of the Constitution, reveres the vision of the Founding Fathers, and rages at what’s wrong with our current government. While chewing through this meaty treatise on libertarianism, pay tribute to Paul’s Texas roots by chewing through a broiled steak.

In a Pyrex dish, marinade a cut of flank steak with extra-virgin olive oil, crushed garlic, cumin, oregano, chili powder, kosher salt, and freshly ground black pepper; toss in some red wine too, but only if it’s from California—Paul’s an isolationist. While this sits, mix together sour cream, one chopped chipotle in adobo sauce, plus some adobo sauce, salt, pepper, and a few squeezes of a lime to create a smoky, hot dipping sauce. When the guests arrive, stick the steak under the broiler for two minutes, then flip it and cook it for another two minutes. Transfer to a cutting board, drape it with tin foil, and let it sit for seven minutes. Slice against the grain and serve it with your sauce. Keep your utensils in the drawer.

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Be an appeaser!! Learn to cook like the enemy!

Eat like Mahmud Ahmadinejad [Chow.com]

Want to cook a whole pig in 4 hours? Try a Cuban roasting box [Oregonlive.com]

Make some traditional Venezuelan Arepas [Washington Post]

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Endless Simmer has spent the past several months delving deep into the political world, in order to tell you which presidential candidate will ultimately be the most responsive to issues us food lovin’ folk care about. We have un-endorsed the candidates one-by-one, and you may have noticed that every single one of the candidates we un-endorsed quickly fell from contention. Remember Mitt Romney, Mike Huckabee and Hillary Clinton? Neither do we!

Now that the primaries are nearing a conclusion, we’re ready to unveil our actual endorsement. After much agonizing, we have come to the conclusion that there is only one candidate with the ideas, convictions, and yes, cojones, that the job demands.

That man is Gene Amondson.

Gene Amondson is an artist, ordained minister, whimsical woodworker and the nominee of the Prohibition Party, which yes, still exists. Gene enjoys barbecues, fish and chips, tarts, and is even the author of an illustrated pie cookbook, which is available for sale as an e-book and comes with the amazing tagline:

“The best pies are runny pies, like kisses, the good ones are never dry.”

Hath truer words e’er been spoke?

Here, here, Mr. Amondson. Presidential hopefuls shouldn’t get away with writing quickie books about their political philosophy - they should have to tell us what they can cook! And we should note the pie recipes were handed down to Gene from his mother, and he gives her full credit (ahem, Cindy McCain).

But Gene Amondson isn’t just in the presidential race for the fame and the baked goods - he’s in it for the women. Gene is on the market for a first lady, and he’s got his list of qualifications all ready. Hey, if Dennis Kucinich can use the democratic process to find himself a hot lady, why can’t Gene Amondson?

While you might think our sometimes drunken ways would make ES anti-prohibition, Amondson makes some very convincing points, particularly when he is protesting outside Anheuser-Busch headquarters while dressed as the Grim Reaper. For example, who knew that from 1920 to 1933, when prohibition was in effect:

- Prisons and mental institutions emptied

- Cirrhosis of the liver was reduced by half

- It was the last time America balanced the budget

- In some states, illiteracy dropped from 49% to 2%

Pretty startling stuff, eh? I’d like to add a couple more reasons why it’s time to bring back prohibition:

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Let me tell you, getting this shot off was NOT easy.

So 80 and I were walking home from work and we’re just yacking away or whatever, fine, I’m yacking, and all of a sudden I’m screaming, “OMG, that’s totally Andrew Sullivan blogging at Subway!”

I stop dead and make 80 walk past the Subway to double check. And yup, it is. I then pull out my phone to snap a picture, but with no zoom on my cell, I realized I would have to go *inside* to get a picture off.

The plan: 80 would go in, buy chips, I would pretend to check my phone and start snapping away. Well, apparently 80 all of a sudden grows some morals (if they’re growable) since his much-noted celeb sighting and doesn’t want to go through with it. I immediately call BS for back up.

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The results of last week’s veggie burger battle royale are in, and with 98 percent of all precincts reporting, Eat Air’s Big V captured 47 percent of the vote, earning the official title of best veggie burger in the world. Ever.

Since today is a big election day, we’re going with a political theme for this week’s Who Cooked It Better. The good folks over at Urban Spoon recently crunched some numbers to come up with the Steak/Sushi index, which shows that any city’s voting habits can be predicted by its ratio of steak houses to sushi joints. The nation’s political divide falls almost exactly along these lines, from Dallas (most Republican; most steak houses) to San Francisco (most Democratic; most sushi).

Of course, in 2008 everyone is all gaga for unity and bipartisanship, and what better way to celebrate such feelings than with steak sushi. This inspired creation is popping up on more and more restaurant menus, and it’s a delicious trend that should keep on trending, if you ask me.

Our first steak sushi roll, pictured on the left, is from Sushi Day, who offers up some beautiful butter-fried flank steak cooked to a pinkish rare. But more importantly, Sushi Day has the gall/genius to roll it up with onion slices and french fries! (The fries are both inside the sushi roll AND served alongside it.) This non-conformist sushi is topped off with BBQ sauce. Full recipe here.

Our second steak sushi recipe is from Gourmet, and as you might expect, they go avant-garde, getting rid or the seaweed and instead wrapping a bloody steak in thinly-sliced carrot ribbons. A mustard sauce made of basil, parsley, shallots, capers and garlic brings the flavor, and a flaky sea salt garnish adds extra arty effect (does anyone else think it looks like sushi falling from the sky?) Full recipe here.

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Have an idea for a Who Cooked It Better or wanna see your own blog featured? Pop an email over to info@endlesssimmer.com

Photos: Sushi Day, Gourmet

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Those of you who read my interview with John McCain on Monday may have noticed his evasive “no comment” answer when I quizzed him on his wife Cindy’s passion fruit mousse recipe. Well it turns out I should have dug deeper into this story because the mousse has become a major campaign scandal!

As The Huffington Post reported yesterday, not a single one of Cindy McCain’s “family recipes” featured on the McCain website were actually original recipes, but instead cut-and-pasted versions of FoodNetwork.com recipes from Rachael Ray and Giada! Oh, Cindy!

The McCain campaign has responded swiftly and forcefully, removing the offending recipes from his website and firing an intern who they are blaming the whole mess on. (In response, Endless Simmer has fired our own intern for failing to uncover this aspect of the story.)

But now, HuffPost is reporting that Cindy also submitted the “original recipe” to a New York Sun article back in January. Guess they’ll have to blame that one on the intern too.

As you can see from the press conference photo above, McCain is standing by his wife for now - but it’s anyone’s guess how long he’ll be able to hold on before throwing Cindy under the bus as well.

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