Petunia: A How-To Guide on Roasting a Pig

Despite this miserably hot and muggy summer, we’ll be dammed if 100-plus degree heat is going to stop us from cooking out. But what does a food obsessed person do when you want to up the game from your casual cook out?  Roast a pig for 150 people on a Saturday that turned out to be the sweatiest day of the year, that’s what.

I’ve never roasted a pig before. I’ve been to one and assisted in babysitting one, so I figured it was about time I cooked one. But not alone — my friend Tyler was eager to jump in and get dirty, and with a garden to boot I had myself a co-host. The BF helped too, something to do with music and dealing with me stress over an 80-lb pig for weeks. We all played our part.

I’ll admit, the logistics of hosting a pig roast made me thankful I wont be doing it again for another year.  There was so much I didn’t account for or didn’t think of, and didn’t realize most of it until too late.

So here’s my gift to you: a 16-step how-to on hosting your own pig roast.

 

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Attack of the Meme: Top 10 Food Texts from Last Night

So maybe the whole Texts From Last Night thing is yesterday’s news (Wikipedia says it’s a “living document of twentysomething life in 2009“) but really, we all know they’re still great even in 2011. (Just as long as drugs keep making us hungry, of course.)

So, here are my Top 10 Food related TFLNs.  Feel free to disagree with me, but you can’t deny it: we’ve ALL been there, or wish we have been.

Top 10 Food Texts from Last Night

10. Straight to the point.

(Original Photo: Neil Conway)

9. Class or booze?

(Original Photo: Steampunk Family the von Hedwigs)

8. So…bread?

(Original Photo: frozenchipmunk)

7. Always make room for essentials.

(Original Photo: Nicola since 1972)

6. Prince Charming.


(Original Photo: Comic Book Movie)

Next: Top 5 Food Texts from Last Night

Italian BLT: Pancetta e Lattuga e Pomodoro

Question:  What is the best meal for parents of a six-month-old?  Answer:  Anything fast and easy.

Yes, ladies and gentlemen, complicated weeknight dinners are out the window for me lately, as a full day’s work and the brief window of time I get to spend with the baby now eat up a large portion of my time.  That means dinner is often not even started until around 7:30 p.m. and we’re usually making meal decisions based on ease of preparation.

And yet, when the rather pedestrian idea of making a BLT came up, I decided that the least I could do was spiff it up a bit with some Italian flair.  The result was a tasty meal that wasn’t much more difficult than your run of the mill cold cut sandwich.

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Plate It or Hate It

Recent food world discoveries the ES crew is loving and hating…

Plate It: Grapesicles

Frozen grapes on a stick. The most perfectly simple summer cooler ever. Bonus points for the bed of frozen melon balls.  (Little Ladies Who Lunch, via fuck yeah my health).

Hate It: Cake Pops

We’re all about cute, but there’s just no need. Why would anyone take a tender cake and turn it into a round mass of gumminess? Then take that disgusting bit and dip it in candy melts? Candy melts are about as tasty as candle wax. Please, just let us eat cake.  (Photo: Mimsen)

Plate It: Food Duels

 

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Milkshakes Gone Wild

Chocolate or vanilla? Are you kidding me? Milkshakes are the latest classic comfort fare to get a foodie-fied makeover, and we’re liking what we see. From bacon and bourbon to sweet potatoes and cereal, these creative innovations from chefs and bloggers around the country would make your grandmother’s milkshakes blush.

1. Cereal Milk Milkshake

Blogger Savory Notes took everyone’s favorite end-of-bowl treat — cereal-steeped milk — and turned it into cereal-flavored milkshakes.

Recipe: cereal milk milkshakes

2. Sweet Potato Cashew Milkshake

At Baltimore’s B&O American Brasserie, chef Thomas Dunklin whips up sweet potato ice cream and blends it with candied cashews and bourbon.

Recipe: sweet potato cashew milkshake

3. Dulce de Bacon Milkshake

Does life get any better than dulce de leche and bacon up in your milkshake? We don’t think so. Kudos to Adventures in Cooking for dreaming this up.

Recipe: dulce de bacon milkshake

 

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Ink Worthy Eats: Top 10 Food Tattoos, Part 2

With heatwaves come lots of skin. And these days, lots of skin comes with tons of ink. It seems the days of tramp stamps, tribal signs and Chinese characters have given way to our new national pastime: food. Here’s our 2nd sampling of indulgent food tattoos.

Top 10 Food Tattoos, Part 2

10. We get it. Everyone loves bacon.

(Photo: Fuck Yeah, Tattoos!)

9. What a brave little toaster. (Best movie ever, no?)


(Photo: Fuck Yeah, Tattoos!)

8. Be kind to the pizza, bro!


(Photo: Fuck Yeah, Tattoos!)

7. Margaritaville. (Lost shaker and salt, get it?!)

(Photo: Fuck Yeah, Tattoos!)

6. Constant countdown to happy hour.

(Photo: Fuck Yeah, Tattoos!)

Next: Top 5 Food Tattoos

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