Extreme Brownies: Cookie Dough Cheesecake Brownie Pastry Pockets

Have you seen this new trend in which describing something as “to die for” is no longer good enough? I keep seeing these recipes named “Better Than Sex Cake, Sex in a Pan, etc…” Really? I’m pretty sure sex outside of a pan is still better.

But I get it. It’s a quick hook to get you to look a little closer. And if there’s one recipe that I’m going to describe that way, it’s definitely this one. Now that we’ve established that, do lean in close and take a look at this sexified brownie creation.  Inside that pastry pocket is a cookie dough cheesecake brownie bar — yes, It’s a mouthful. This mouthful is an extreme brownie with a sweet and salty combination that finishes with a dusting of confectioner’s sugar and some chocolate and caramel drizzle — how’s that for a happy ending?

So in playing along with the current sex and food trend, I give you the Brownie Sex Maker. This will make you and the person you share with it want to do anything…for reals.

Cookie Dough Cheesecake Brownie Pastry Pockets…a.ka. The Brownie Sex Maker

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Hunger Games? More Like Full-of-Brownie Games

Fine, I’ll admit it. I totally got into the Hunger Games. In a big way. I figured it was just another trendy teen book so I resisted it forever. I ended up taking it as a plane book, forgot to read it on said plane, got bored a couple weeks ago and decided to skim through the first chapter and see what all the fuss was about… fast-forward to 2am , and I was desperately devouring the last few pages! I just had to know what happened to Katniss and Peeta. Whatever, at least I’m not into Twilight, right?

So when the Hunger Games-themed cookbook came out, I jumped. My two passions in life — food and Hunger Games — together?! Done. (Fine, HG isn’t my passion, but it sure felt like it during that three-hour period when I read it cover-to-cover. KATNISS!) Ahem. Anyway, here we have it, The Unofficial Hunger Games Cookbook by Emily Ansara Baines. I think it’s pretty funny how much they’re required to emphasize the “unofficial” aspect.

Alright, so, real talk: this cookbook is really contrived. I will concede that I am a bit older and more experienced in the culinary realm than its target demographic, but some of these recipes are straight-up ridic. We’re talking “Hazelle’s Beaver Stew with Rosemary Potatoes” and “Banquet-Baked Mountain Goat with Artichokes, Tomatoes, and Fresh Herbs” (ingredients: “2 pounds wild goat tenderloin or round steak,” yeah, probably the round steak, I haven’t seen any mountain goat at my farmer’s market lately). Oh, and even “Grilled Tree Rat with Peanut Butter Dipping Sauce.” Seeing as how most of these recipes are pretty simple and made for young cooks to try out, I don’t think suggesting TREE RAT is really the most realistic path to take, Emily Ansara Baines.

Also of note are the cooking suggestions included with each recipe, hilariously entitled “Tips from Your Sponsor.” And, perhaps the best part, a little description under the title of each dish explaining how any recipe, even something as simple as cookies, ties in with Hunger Games. My favorite example:

“A twist on the classic chocolate chip cookie, this cookie is similar to Katniss’s spirit — mostly dark, with patches of light throughout.”

Hahaha, WHAAAAAT. Stop. Just stop. I mean, I know it’s probably hard to fill an entire cookbook, but come on. Anyway, who am I to judge until I’ve at least tested some of these recipes for myself, right? My initial impulse was to make Katniss’ favorite lamb stew (an obvious yet necessary choice) but I didn’t have enough time and wanted to make something before the movie premiere today. I decided on brownies:

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10 Christmas Treats Better Than Christmas Cookies

Last week I couldn’t figure out what the deal is with Christmas cookies. And after some ranting, I was still curious-slash-irritated. I decided that I’d actually rather eat the dreaded cupcake over some  snickerdoodle. Let’s stroll through some other Christmas eats more exciting than those damn cookies.

10. Ho! Ho!

(Photo: Strange Days)

9. Life is Like…

(Photo: omgitsrenzo)

8. Honestly, I Don’t Know What This Is Made Of, But It’s Gorgeous, Right?!

(Photo: Icy Snow of Winter)

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8 Recipes Inspired By Halloween Candy

Halloween is always fun, but eventually you reach an age when candy alone just isn’t exciting enough anymore. And that’s when you start getting creative.

1. Milky Way Brownies

What’s better than a candy bar? A candy bar inside a chocolate brownie.

Recipe: Recipe Girl

2. Snickers Cupcakes

The caramel, peanut-y goodness of America’s favorite candy bar, re-imagined as a cupcake.

Recipe: Annie’s Eats

3. Butterfinger Cheesecake

Our own Bakers Royale dreamed up this pretzel-butterfinger-chocolate concoction.

Recipe: Bakers Royale

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Attack of the Meme: The Best of Parks and Recreation Food Banter

There’s not much in this life that can cure my end of summer blues. Brussels sprout season comes close. So does the chance to wear leggings and my gold-studded flats. But, really, it’s watching Leslie Knope promoting parks, recreation, feminism and pot brownies.

With Parks and Recs starting tonight, here’s the best of its food banter.

10. A Simple Man

(Photo: CraftyCake)

9. Tissues Are Out, Scones are In

(Photo: Nine Weasleys)

8. Biology 101

(Photo: Forehead)

7. The New Aphrodisiacs

(Photo: Broriarty)

6. Life Lessons

Next: Top 5 Moments in Food Banter on Parks and Rec

Peeps Gone Wild

OK, we’re addicted. We’ve realized that those puffy Easter candies everyone throws out around May 1st are good for more than just target practice. Turns out you can put them in everything from brownies to pizza. In hopes of never letting another peep go stale, here are our favorite peeps recipes from ES and around the web.

Salted Caramel and Dark Chocolate Covered Peeps

Raspberry Eggplant blog gives the purple guys a gourmet makeover.

Recipe: salted caramel and dark chocolate covered peeps

Peeps Monkey Bread

Pull-apart buttermilk biscuits stuffed with peeps, via the Knead for Speed

Recipe: Peeps monkey Bread


Chocolate bunnies and flourescent bunnies combine to make one perfect Easter snack, courtesy of Foy Update.

Recipe: peeps s’mores

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A Dessert for St. Patrick: Irish Brownie Bombs

You’ve had your Guinness in a cold mug, your whiskey straight up and your Bailey’s in a mixed drink, and of course maybe all in one for an Irish Car Bomb. But this St. Patrick’s day let’s try it in a dessert with some Irish Brownie Bombs.

It’s a classic brownie bottom with some Guinness mixed in the batter. On top of the brownie is a cheesecake layer blended with some Bailey’s. Finally, mix your Jameson whiskey shot into the three leaf clover piping. And there you have it, Irish Brownie Bombs that won’t leave you with a black-eye.

Order up!

Irish Brownie Bombs

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