Ink Worthy Eats: Top 10 Food Tattoos, Part 2

With heatwaves come lots of skin. And these days, lots of skin comes with tons of ink. It seems the days of tramp stamps, tribal signs and Chinese characters have given way to our new national pastime: food. Here’s our 2nd sampling of indulgent food tattoos.

Top 10 Food Tattoos, Part 2

10. We get it. Everyone loves bacon.

(Photo: Fuck Yeah, Tattoos!)

9. What a brave little toaster. (Best movie ever, no?)


(Photo: Fuck Yeah, Tattoos!)

8. Be kind to the pizza, bro!


(Photo: Fuck Yeah, Tattoos!)

7. Margaritaville. (Lost shaker and salt, get it?!)

(Photo: Fuck Yeah, Tattoos!)

6. Constant countdown to happy hour.

(Photo: Fuck Yeah, Tattoos!)

Next: Top 5 Food Tattoos

Sometimes You Gotta Take It to the House: Decadent Vacation Eating

Sometimes on vacation you take a step back. You remember that this is not some isolated period and choose yogurt for lunch, because what happens here (aka insane food and drinking choices) will catch up with you in non-vacation land.

Sometimes, though, as my friend Matt would say, you gotta take it to the house.

And this is where this large mound of meat comes in. On my first day in Cleveland I wanted something decadent, something that I could eat slowly, enjoy an alfresco setting, and take in an exotic beer. I found my match at The Greenhouse Tavern in an adorable, if not somewhat manufactured, alley in the midst of downtown.

After conferring with my server, I decided on:

Hand Ground Beef Tartare Frites w/ pommes frites, 42 minute egg, salted red jalapeño & condiments, $13.

Before my dish came out, I took a trip to the Ladies’. I walked down the stairs and as soon as I looked up I was in the kitchen watching a woman butcher a huge pig. I just stood and stared. After that, I had a good feeling about my meal. Ordering a raw dish can be scary, but knowing what care they take to bring in animals, I was ready.

Honestly, the dish was everything I wanted. Fresh meat, slightly seasoned with chives. Crisp fries with two (!) dipping sauces—a kicky dijon mustard and a creamy aioli—and three additional toppings of finely diced red onion, finely diced cornichon, and finely diced poached and roasted jalepeno (the most interesting item on the plate). And a barely cooked egg, even though it had been heated for 42 minutes.

I chatted with Jerry, over the phone, to find out exactly what a 42 minute egg meant: The egg is kept in its shell, with only a small crack made at the top. It’s then dropped in a water bath and held at 150 degrees for 42 minutes. The egg is cooled in an ice bath before landing on top of raw beef.

For that exotic beer I mentioned, well, exotic is relative: I sipped on a stout, Tallgrass Brewing‘s Buffalo Sweat, from Kansas.

 

Pickled Loafs and Teriyaki Smokes: Cleveland’s West Side Market

There are two things people think they must do in Cleveland. One is the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame and Museum. But instead of spending 4 hours inside, I quickly trolled around the lobby and gift shop and then explored the waterfront around the gorgeous, Louvre-like building. Outside of the museum there were some food vendors, a food truck and some rouge fisherman (check out the album) catching walleye and perch. (There are “no fishing” signs all over the place!)

But I did fully visit another landmark, Cleveland’s historic West Side Market, a large building housing produce, meats, meats, meats, pierogies and Italian specialty items.

10 Finds from Cleveland’s West Side Market

1. Question the produce.

With avocados sitting next to Brussels sprouts, apples and tomatoes, at first glance this market seemed to get its produce from all over the place. But my guide Heather told me that if you start asking vendors, and as the summer offers more local vegetables, you’ll be able to find true Ohian fare.

2. Love your loafs.

I don’t know what’s in a Pickle Loaf. And I’m afraid to ask.

3.Try a new meat.

This just screamed Midwest to me. Plus I’m just picturing that SNL skit with the Super Fans from Chicago and all they keep repeating in their heads are: Ditka, sausage, Kielbasa, Jordan, Ditka, sausage, Da Bears, Ditka… (go to minute 4)

4. Don’t leave Cleveland without a pierogi tasting.

My one regret is leaving Cleveland without trying a pierogi. Heather and I ate a late lunch (gravity-defying apple!) and we didn’t arrive to the market until about an hour to close. Heather’s favorite pierogi comes from Pierogi Palace, but it closed shop before we got there and she didn’t want to subject me to less than awesome potato nuggets. But when you go, Heather suggests the jalepeno/potato/cheese pierogies. (Check her other top picks for West Side Market.) I guess that means another trip to the “Mistake by the Lake.”

5. Smoke something.

I don’t know why, but the word “smokies” really cracks me up.

Next: 5 More Finds from Cleveland’s West Side Market

Artsy Answer for Artsy Photo of the Day

What band used this giant hot dog as a stage prop in 1994?

Answer after the jump.

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Artsy Guess the Photo of the Day

Guess which band used this giant hot dog as a stage prop in 1994?

Find the answer here Monday. I mean Tuesday. Happy 4th!

The Legend of Umami

I first heard about the concept of umami when I was helping to open a Japanese restaurant a few years back. During our training, the chef was telling us about the Japanese word umami, which is the “fifth taste.” After sweet, salty, sour, and bitter, what is left? What is the taste that will truly satiate? Apparently it is umami, which loosely translates to “pleasantly savory.” Fair enough.

Umami seems to be a rather intangible concept. If you so desire, take a look at its Wikipedia article, which has all sorts of tips on what foods contain “high amounts of umami” and uses a lot of science-y terms that overwhelm me. To me, umami is my unicorn of the food world. It has a mystical appeal, only made more desirable by the fact that I don’t know if I fully understand or believe in it. But am intrigued by its powers.

A small restaurant chain in LA, unsurprisingly named Umami Burger, has attempted to harness the power of umami. Many of my California friends rave about it. On the cover of the June issue of Food & Wine there is an amazing-looking burger; Patrick and I decided we had to make it, and upon inspection of the recipe, discovered it was an Umami Burger with Port and Stilton. Perfect!

 

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