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by snebbu

Top 10 Beers to Drink on Halloween

Other than eating half of it, what are you planning on doing while handing out Halloween candy? Hopefully you’re planning on scaring the crap out of kids. Or maybe popping in your favorite scary movie. Regardless, why not do that while drinking a seasonal brew?

I’ve sampled each of the beers listed (and then some) to create a lineup of the top ten beers to drink on Halloween. Rather than ranking them, I put them into my own categories in order for you to determine which would be your best pick. I suggest picking two (or three) solid choices that you know you will like. Then, take a risk and try something new! On to the research:

Sweetest Pumpkin Beer: Tommyknocker Brewery’s “Small Patch Pumpkin Harvest Ale”

ABV: 5%

Pumpkin pie with whipped cream on top. That pretty much sums up this one. It smells like pumpkin pie and tastes like pumpkin pie. This is not for those out there that don’t enjoy sweets, particularly sweet beers. But for those who do, try it out. It’s a great dessert beer. It is medium bodied and has more of a sweet pumpkin taste than the spice taste that most pumpkin beers do. It’s a crisp, clear brew that’s easy (and sweet) drinking.

Spiciest Pumpkin Beer: Sam Adams Fat Jack Pumpkin Ale

ABV: 8.5%

You’ve heard about this one before, but trust me, it’s got all you want for a cool fall night. The brew offers a warming feeling with every sip–the same feeling in your stomach you get from a sip of Jack Daniels—while also delivering the sweet taste of pumpkin. You can taste the spices of cinnamon, ginger, and even the allspice together with pumpkin.

“Tastes Most Like Pumpkin” Beer: Southern Tier Brewing Company Pumking Ale

by snebbu

Where art Thou, Candy Corn Oreo?!

Panic. The horror, the horror. For weeks now, I’ve searched various Target stores for the “limited edition” Candy Corn Oreos, where they are supposedly “exclusively available.” Well, apparently “limited edition” means first week of October, because I’ve found none. Zero. And I’m pretty pissed about it. Plus, I’m a little confused about what Nabisco considers “seasonal.”

I can’t just keep this disappointment to myself, so I’ve decided to harness this energy and write an open letter to Nabisco:

Dear Nabisco,

First and foremost, let me say, Happy Halloween! I know how much you appreciate all of the holidays. And I admire your effort in honoring almost all of them. The green and red Oreo filling, pastel colored Oreos for Easter—it’s great. And you’ve been thinking out of the box lately—kudos. I’ve seen Neapolitan Oreos, Lemon Oreos, and even Candy Corn Oreos.

For a “limited time,” we (America) were permitted to explore the hidden treasure of a candy corn Oreo. Way-to-go on this. I am sending you a virtual gold star, and your report card will reflect it with an “O for Outstanding” and a smiley face inside of it. Those who were able to try these enjoyed the adventure.

Those who did not get to enjoy it are still looking for the damn candy corn Oreos. I thought this was a “limited time” thing as in, for the Halloween season. Perhaps you’re confused about what “seasonal” means. The sources I’ve checked define seasonal as “dependent on season or determined by a certain time of the year.” Not sure you knew this, but Halloween is on October 31st every year. It’s like Christmas—the date is constant. It’s not one of those tricky things that requires you to calculate the date.

You see, this is why I found it odd over two weeks ago (that would be mid-October) not to find the candy-corn Oreos. I found the other “seasonal” treats like candy corn, caramel apple lollipops, tons and tons of Halloween themed candy, even those stupid Halloween pretzels. Of course, these are all offered for a limited time. But apparently not as limited as your Candy Corn Oreos. However, I was able to find Neapolitan Oreos (which you would think would be offered in the summer?)

I had so many ideas for these Oreos. The possibilities were really endless. For instance, Candy Corn Oreo balls, Candy Corn Oreo cupcakes, Candy Corn Oreos covered in white chocolate, and even Candy Corn Oreo cheesecake. Instead, what did I get? Nothing. Nada. Zilch. Rather than doing that, I grabbed some seasonal beers and enjoyed some Oktoberfest brews. Do your f’ing homework.

kthnxbye.

For anyone that did find these things and made something awesome—let us know! We’re very intrigued…

in Rants & Raves 2 comments

by snebbu

Top 10 Worst Things to Give Trick-or-Treaters

I miss trick-or-treating. Don”t tell me you don”t. If so, then you hate all things good in the world. You hide in your house with the lights off as kids fashion their prized costumes anxiously awaiting a sweet treat. You people suck, and probably have no perspective on the meaning of “It”s the Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown.” You”re a Halloween scrooge. Poo poo on you.

For the rest of us, the Holiday is upon is. Get ready to scare the bajesis out of the kiddo”s, hoping to make one of them pee or crap their pants. Then, you win them back with a sweet treat and you”re suddenly known around the block for it. I”m hoping to scare some kids, and I”ll be honest—I”ve eyed up the candies that are anxiously awaiting Halloween in the house, and I”m psyched for left-overs.

Last year we brought you a list of the top 10 trick or treat candy fails, but the truth is, it actually gets a lot worse than Tootsie Rolls and Mounds (shudder!) Here are your top ten tricks that you shouldn”t be handing out this Halloween:

10. Pretzels

Yeah, I like my fair share of salty goodies—but not on Halloween. Just because the pretzels are shaped like bats and pumpkins doesn”t mean they are meant for Halloween. Especially not to give out. At a party? Sure. To give out at your doorstep? Hellz no.

(Photo: walmart.com)

9. Chips

Chips…Cheez-Its…doesn”t matter. Are they sweet? No. Do they leave a residue on your teeth that requires extra-long tooth brushing? No. So what”s the point? If kids want chips then they can go to the closet of their house. I”m willing to bet there isn”t a wide variety of candy to choose from. Only chips and cereal.

(Photo: alwaysdirect.com)

8. Peanuts

Yes, this actually happened to me. Need I say more?

in Desserts / Holiday / Lists / Top 10 Lists 14 comments

by snebbu

Endless Road Trip Boston: Ye Olde Union Oyster House

On our Sam Adams tour, we heard references to the Union Oyster house several times during the two hours we were there. One memorable reference was to their food, while the other was to a beer that they brew only to serve at that one location. So obviously, our post-brewery eating agenda was set.

Of course, what’s a trip to Boston without a little history?! The Union Oyster House claims to fame because of its food, yes, but also its history. It’s the oldest restaurant (in continuous service) in the United States. The restaurant has seated members of the Union Army, those damn Red Coats (I’m sure), presidents and politician, including plenty of those Kennedys. Apparently JFK had a favorite booth upstairs that is now dedicated to him—“The Kennedy Booth.”

It’s also more in more demand than we thought…with a three-hour wait, we had reservations at 10:00 P.M. It was also worth it…

Oyster House Clam Chowder

in Fish / Food Travel / Red Meat / Restaurants 3 comments

by snebbu

Burns My Bacon: Fast Food Cheaters

WATCH OUT! Taco Bell has a new chef in town, and she’s changing the way of Taco Bell’s menu by adding a healthy option to help make you more regular after chomping down on a Doritos Taco. Unstinking offices everywhere after the lunch break. Thank goodness a “renowned” chef has come to the rescue of FAST FOOD.
You’ve heard and saw the commercials— Celebrity Chef Lorena Garcia has been wined and dined by Taco Bell and she accepts her new position as face of the franchise. Yes—a human has replaced the famed speaking pup that brought Taco Bell to a new level. Let me say that again – a professionally trained chef, has taken on the role of a strung out Chihuahua.

Why is this cheating? It’s not that I don’t enjoy the occasional guilty pleasure of a quick trip through the drive-through. But more that Lorena Garcia has completely sold out to a corporation that houses their “mexican cuisine” stores in the same buildings as KFCs. Rather than creating her own restaurants and using fresh, local ingredients, she is “making it big” with the fast food industry. Now, she has the distinct honor of having her foods frozen and shipped across the country to drunks everywhere.

I don’t care if you open a dive bar or diner—but make it your own for goodness sake! But at least she made the burrito healthy by…get this…taking out the tortilla. I think there’s another restaurant chain that does that…and I’m willing to bet their ingredients are ten times fresher and real(er?) than Taco Bell. Do you see Bobby Flay “crunchifying” burgers at the BK and Golden Arches? Is Gordon Ramsey making Au Bon Pain a more “refined” establishment? No. And they shouldn’t. I know most celebrity chefs “sell out” on occasion, but I feel like this is beyond that. Packaging your own “unique” and “special” recipes, freezing them, and selling them at your local Taco Bell is cheating. And we really don’t like cheaters here…C’mon Man!

in Celebs / Rants & Raves 6 comments

by snebbu

Endless Road Trip Boston: Sam Adams Pumpkin Ale

If you’ve never been to a brewery before, you may be expecting some mechanical experience where you are watching them brew on the other side of a glass window. Maybe you expect to see a bunch of hoses shooting beer from one place to another, leading to a huge bottling machine. Maybe, if you’re lucky—you’ll get a free sample of beer. Not the case at Sam Adams…and that’s a good thing.

The tour starts out in a small tunnel shaped like a keg. From there, you show them your “ticket” which is a Sam Adams label. Then, you literally walk right through the brewery. You’ll see some dudes with kick-ass beards working on the freshest brew. Oh, and you’ll be smacked in the face with the delicious smell of grains and can go touch the huge vats that brew “America’s World Class Beer”.

*Impress your friends*: One piece of info that many of you may not know – Sam Adams is one of the breweries around that makes sure their beer is like no other – they harvest their own yeast. So, no – you can not completely replicate any of their brews. Impressed? (with me, obviously…) You should be.

On to the best part of the tour: the bar.

in Drinks 0 comments

by snebbu

Endless Road Trip Boston: Mike’s City Diner

We’ve made a bit of a tradition out of seeking out restaurants featured on the show Diners, Drive-Ins, and Dives. Cheesy and touristy? Sure, but we haven’t been disappointed so far. The quest continued with Mike’s City Diner in Boston. You’d think it’d be well known in the entire Boston area, so I asked the folks at Sam Adams what the best means to get to the diner is. They had no idea of where it even was, so either my perspective on the size of Boston was horribly off, or maybe they just never make it out to that side of town. Either way—they are missing out. Mike’s City Diner does not disappoint, and there’s a reason why Guy Fieri was “Rollin’ Out” to Mike’s City Diner in Boston. Here are the highlights:

in Bacon / Food Travel / Red Meat / Restaurants / Sandwich 0 comments