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Will the Real Sarah Palin Recipe Please Stand Up?

Posted by on September 4 2008 in Bacon, Fish, Food Travel, Politics, Red Meat

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Earlier this week, Republican VP candidate Sarah Palin was forced to deny a vicious family rumor by admitting another, slightly less vicious rumor. But we here at ES could care less how many babies and/or grandbabies the guv did or didn’t have; we’re more concerned with a much more dangerous rumor. So let’s clear the air Mama Palin, what exactly are you putting in those hockey mom lunch boxes?

By now, everyone with half an Internet connection is aware that Sarah Palin hunts moose, spears catfish, and can strangle a polar bear with her own hands. But for some reason (possible Cindy McCain’s cookie fiasco), the McCain-Palin campaign has yet to release a single Sarah Palin recipe! And now the hungry hungry internets are filling up with creative recipes that claim to be from Sarah Palin, but there’s no way to know for sure. So it’s up to you readers: Which purported Sarah Palin recipe is the real deal?

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- Sarah’s Reindeer Cupcake recipe has been making the rounds on the web quicker than Barack Obama can drown a newborn baby in a bizarre Muslim rite overseen by his crazy Christian pastor. According to the recipe, SP takes 1 pound of fresh ground caribou meat, mixes it up with flour, salt, sugar & egg to a doughy consistency and bakes at 375 for 45 minutes or 25 minutes if you like ‘em rare. Then they’re topped with crunchy sprinkles: “Cut the antler and hooves into chunks and then put in blender and grind until it looks like ground walnuts…Coat each cupcake with the frosting and then decorate with the crunchy sprinkles…Serves 12.”

- Over at Yahoo Answers, one writer is claiming that Palin is more partial to the Northern delicacy of Fried Polar Bear Liver, seasoned with onions and buffalo chips. This one veers more than a little over the deep end, but hey, it could be the new foie gras.

- On the slightly more believable front, Cakespace is running with “Sarah Palin’s Alaskan Crab Wrap,” which I must declare sounds delicious, but then again, so do most things that combine crab and bacon. But ripe, diced brie? Could this red-blooded conservative really be a lover of such a lefty, Francophile, elitist ingredient? Now I don’t know what to believe.

- Meanwhile, everyone is all up on the reports that Sarah loves the Moose Burgers. Moose meat is illegal to sell so, it’s assumed, she kills and prepares her own moose. Supposedly. But we have yet to see a convincing burger recipe from Gov. Palin. Ireport has one recipe that calls for Walla Walla onions and fat from 3 Alaskan legislators or 1 Washington insider. But seriously, Sarah, if this moose burger thing is real, I wanna see some photos. You know the burger porn drill. Slice in half and get me a shot of it all red and runny with the cheese dripping over the top. Mmm….moose meat.

Remember, Sarah: this can all stop if you just tell the truth and give us one, certifiably real recipe. But for now, we’ll let you readers determine the truth:

[Poll id="22"]

Photos: Alaska Seafood, via So Good, Guylaine2007, longhorndave, Ian Ransley, Vigour

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10 Responses leave one →
  1. September 4, 2008

    You know, it’s funny you posted this, because I was reading the transcript from her speech last night and there’s a part she mentions that to cut the excess spending in AL, she got rid of the governor’s personal chef and then added “Sometimes the kids sure miss her though” which made me think she doesn’t cook. Or doesn’t cook well. Then again, I guess being governor and all keeps one pretty busy, probably too busy to cook. WTF will the kids eat when she’s VP?

  2. September 4, 2008

    Thank you for raising this extremely important issue. We MUST know what her favorite recipe is. How else can we judge her qualifications for office?

    Or is this a situation where we need to reverse stereotypical gender roles the media applies to candidates wives submitting recipes and make the guy serve the part of recipe provider? Someone tell Todd Palin to submit his recipe for moose noodle soup stat.

  3. September 4, 2008

    Could you imagine the uproar the GOP would have from the Animal Rights Activists if SP was posting recipes containing reindeer, moose or polar bear!! :) And what… no roulade of sole with a lobster mousse recipe??

  4. September 4, 2008

    If there’s an official recipe released, I’d bet heavily on it being an Alaskan wild salmon dish. Though the moose-burger recipe, if written with wit, could be a great way to appeal to her base.

  5. Maidelitala permalink*
    September 5, 2008

    Moose stew! She loves moose stew! so says the RNC’s bio video – minute marker 3:44
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uNxilGTvDac&eurl=http://tpmelectioncentral.talkingpointsmemo.com/2008/09/whats_the_plan_to_deal_with_pa.php

  6. Rooms permalink*
    September 16, 2008

    FYI, bear liver is super high in vitamin A, a fat soluble vitamin. Fat soluble vitamins don’t get peed out if you have too much (like water soluble vitamins) so you can OD on them. So eating too much fried polar bear liver might kill her!! You’ll just have to decide for yourself whether those are exclamation points of concern or excitement. Needless to say, I voted for the bear liver;)

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