It’s baaaaack!! On July 15th, the iconic crème-filed sponge cake of my youth returned just in time to get a new generation hooked on its neon yellow yummy-ness. Yeah, this ain’t yer grandpa’s version— this is Twinkie 2.0 baby! It has double the shelf life of the original (which was rumored to last longer than the pyramids!) I don’t know how they’re making this new model, but I’ll never forget the ingredients of the first…(insert harp music here);
‘Enriched wheat flour, sugar, corn syrup, niacin, water, high fructose corn syrup, vegetable shortening – containing one or more of the following: partially hydrogenated soybean oil, cottonseed oil, canola oil and beef fat, dextrose, whole eggs, modified corn starch, cellulose gum, whey, leavenings (sodium acid pyrophosphate, baking soda, monocalcium phosphate), salt, cornstarch, corn flour, corn syrup solids, mono and diglycerides, soy lecithin, polysorbate 60, dextrin, calcium caseinate, sodium stearoyl lactylate, wheat gluten, calcium sulphate, natural and artificial flavors, caramel color, yellow # 5, red # 40’.
Ahhhh,….”caramel color, yellow # 5 and red # 40”. Have you ever heard three more beautiful color additives in your life? I’m tearing up just thinking about it…(sniff).
Anyway, now that I’m older it’s time to celebrate the comeback like an adult—by adding booze of course! Kids get excited because they’re innocent and hopeful but their parents require alcohol and dammit, I’m not gonna let them down!
I know that traditional crème brulee has a torched sugar top but hey – this ain’t traditional! And I don’t want to hear from you purists about not using a real vanilla bean in this process. Did you read the list of garbage that goes into a Twinkie? Fuhgeddaboudit!