Turning Water into Wine, ES Style

I get made fun of a lot on ES Staff emails for a variety of reasons, one of which is my love of instant ramen noodles. I’m not sure if my fellow ES writers are horrified or if they think I’m gross, but now maybe everyone will understand why.

Last year I was dating a man who loved food as much as I did, but like many people…hated cooking elaborate things. The relationship is long gone but this “recipe” isn’t.

After  a month or two of expensive dates, both of us became really poor. I was eating soup out of a box mix (still am, but whatever), and he bought a case of instant ramen. Now, ramen? I know what you’re thinking. I did too. I judged him. I said, “I can’t believe you’re almost 30 and eating ramen for dinner!!”

But then something happened. He made the most delicious thing to come out of his kitchen, and it went something like this:

The Best Ramen Ever

1 brick instant beef ramen (he preferred Maruchan but I think Sapporo Ichiban is far superior)
2 parts Frank’s Red Hot
1 part Tabasco
1 part Sriracha

Boil the 2 cups water or whatever it says on the package. I use a little more because I like it brothy. Cook the noodles for about a minute. When they’re almost done, add the ramen flavor packet and the holy trinity of hot sauces listed above. Simmer ever so gently until the noodles are just about cooked.

Consume and thank me, because this is the best fucking bowl of instant ramen you’ll ever have.

(Disclaimer: the noodles in the above photo are not of the ramen variety, rather some other sort of noodles I bought at the Asian market. They don’t taste as good. I do not recommend)

You may also like


  • Valerie January 18, 2012  

    I actually make something similar. I add garlic chili sauce and sesame oil to ramen cooked the regular way. The sesame oil adds a lot. Try it!

  • andy March 19, 2012  

    I don’t think I have made ramen the same way twice in years. And I vow to never consume another 800mg sodium flavor packet again. I use variations of Better Than Boullion flavors or vegetable broth, various seasoned salts, nutritional yeast, various hot sauces and soy sauces. Make sure to put the flavor into the water before you cook your noodles too. Plus, since this meal often needs to keep me going for a while, I will put in an egg or diced ham or both for protein. Cheese on top is also standard.

Leave a comment