Friday Fuck Up: Attack of the Three Dairy Smoothie

Look how beautiful and pink that drink is. It’s just gorgeous. I wanted this calcium-filled liquid to taste as good as it looked.  But I think I took it one dairy too far.

Like most weekday breakfasts, this one started simply: a blender, yogurt and frozen strawberries. But I barely had any yogurt left so I reopened the fridge. What else could I throw in this? I spied milk. Of course, milk lends itself perfectly to smoothies. Problem is, well, there are two problems. One, I hate milk and don’t like a lot of it in anything I consume. And two, there wasn’t that much milk left and I wanted to save it for my boyfriend’s cereal. I added a splash, but my smoothie begged for more ingredients. So there it was. The final dairy left in my fridge that I thought was somewhat suitable for drinking: cottage cheese.

Clearly, I was wrong. Cottage cheese consumed the entire smoothie, even covering that signature yogurt tang. I gagged to swallow the pink liquid down my throat.

So let this be a warning: keep your smoothies to a two dairy minimum.