In 2011 I’m pretty shocked when I receive a silly forwarded email. Usually it’s about secret ways to dial 911 or some clearly untrue scam, or how to bust a hole through the tail light of a car in case someone shoves me into a trunk.
But a forward I received from my cousin last night actually made me laugh. Out loud. Forgive me if you’ve seen this gem of Jewish humor before. If not, let me present to you the Yiddish zodiac.
For those who frequent Chinese restaurants and see the place mats showing the Chinese zodiac (you know, the year of the rat, the year of the monkey, etc.) – well, here is the official Jewish equivalent. Now you can find out who you are.
THE YIDDISH ZODIAC
The Year of: CHICKEN SOUP
1907, 1919, 1931, 1943, 1955, 1967, 1979, 1991, 2003
You’re a healer, nourishing all whom you encounter. We feel better just being in your presence. Mothers want to bring you home to meet their children – resist this at all costs. Compatible with Bagel and Knish.
The Year of: EGG CREAM
1908, 1920, 1932, 1944, 1956, 1968, 1980, 1992, 2004
You’ve got a devious personality, since you’re made with neither eggs nor cream. Friends find your pranks refreshing; others think you’re too frothy. Compatible with Blintz, who also has something to hide.
The Year of: CHOPPED LIVER
1909, 1921, 1933, 1945, 1957, 1969, 1981, 1993, 2005
People either love you or hate you, making you wonder, “What am I, chopped liver?” But don’t get a complex; you’re always welcome at the holidays! Bagel’s got your back.