Cheflebrity Smörgåsbord: Food Network Gets Animated

Have you been watcing Next Food Network Star?  I have.

Well, technically, I’ve had it on in the background as I try in vain to beat my mom’s top score in Bejeweled Blitz on Facebook.  How does she get so many damn points?!?!

So I’ve been kinda paying attention to this season.  I know that Debbie is gone, which means we won’t hear the word “Korean” every 14.7 seconds.   Anyway, the fact that I’ve not been 100% focused doesn’t mean that I’m not pulling hard for Jeffrey.  Why?  Because he’s just a severe overbite and some bright yellow skin away from being a Simpsons character, and I think the Food Network needs to diversify into animation.

Seriously, they don’t have a single cartoon character on the network — unless you count Paula Deen.

Zing! Pow! Smörg!

– Bourdain does Baltimore and a local complains about the hatchet job, saying he should have sat down with Duff Goldman.  Yeah, that would have gone well.

– Food Network is still going gangbusters during the recession despite dips in restaurant revenue.  This is because staying home and licking your TV screen is significantly cheaper than the prix fixe at The French Laundry.

After the jump…so close yet so far with Giada, “Is that Emeril losing at video poker?” and everyone’s favorite Italian cheftestant woos you with wine.

– When my Google alert e-mail came in and I saw the words “Giada De Laurentiis” and “cheesecake,” I was immediately excited.  Alas…real cheesecakes are not nearly as exciting as cheesecake photos.

– Among the foodie goings-on this week is a festival in Atlantic City.  Endless Simmer Reader of the Year honors go to whoever forwards me photos of Guy Fieri passed out drunk at the craps table!

– Love Fabio Viviani from Top Chef? (Who doesn’t?)  Love wine? (Who doesn’t?!?)  Submit your best food and wine pairing for a chance to meet that handsome, handsome man in Los Angeles.