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Huckabee Does 360 in Attempt to Win Back Foodie Vote

Posted by on January 8 2008 in Contests, Red Meat


Ever since we shocked the political world with our unendorsement of Hillary Clinton last week, which directly lead to her collapse in the Iowa caucuses (even though she had the best snacks!), the presidential candidates have been trembling in their boots to see what Endless Simmer is going to do next.

But make no mistake about it, would-be Commanders-in-Chief: we will not be swayed by false foodiness.

In the most shameless display of food pandering, also unendorsed candidate Mike Huckabee has completely abandoned his Middle America “I love Applebees” positioning, and embraced an elitist Northeastern food stance ahead of the New Hampshire primary.

Case in point: at a campaign stop Monday, the man who formerly only ate horse meat sat down for a “Huck-a-burger.” So what’s in a burger named after the Boy from Hope? Freshly slaughtered spam topped with miracle whip and creamed corn? Nope, check it out:

A Huckaburger is a patty of herb-seared bison, tomato, and baby spinach on a whole wheat English muffin, served with deep-fried pickles.

Herb-seared bison? Baby spinach?? English muffin????? Excuuuuuse me, Monsieur Huckabee. Would you like any Grey Poupon with that?

Honestly, the Huck-a-burger sounds quite delicious. And do tell me more about these fried pickles.

But the food-loving voters of America will not be fooled. Mike Huckabee, for utterly shameless vote-baiting, you are doubly unendorsed.

UPDATE: Oh, wait – I guess that’s supposed to be called a 180. My bad, not a math blog.

Photo: The Elephant

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11 Responses leave one →
  1. JoeHoya permalink
    January 8, 2008

    First Gansie’s endorsement of boxed ‘food’ options (aka cheating) to pander to the set-it-and-forget-it set in advance of the Bloggies, and now someone in New Hampshire decides to name a healthy sandwich after a guy who got kinda-popular getting kinda-skinny.

    What is this world coming to?

  2. January 8, 2008

    aaahhh. i’m such a schemer!

  3. January 8, 2008

    you can say it, JH – it’s what everyone’s been too scared to say outloud. Mike Huckabee is STILL FAT

  4. JoeHoya permalink
    January 8, 2008

    If Huckabee’s still fat, I shudder to think what that makes me. I’d rather buy into the hype that he’s now skinny – that would make me ‘chunky’ or, at best, ‘zaftig.’

  5. January 8, 2008

    haha zaftig is the best word for fat ever

  6. JoeHoya permalink
    January 8, 2008

    When in doubt, go with the Yiddish word for anything.

  7. January 8, 2008

    is there a post on this blog that doesn’t go back to the jews?

  8. January 8, 2008

    well they do control everything

  9. January 8, 2008

    especially the blogs

  10. JoeHoya permalink
    January 8, 2008

    It’s funny – I was about to remind you of my Peru novel, but then I remembered that I threw in that tidbit about quinoa being Kosher for Passover.

    Guess not!

  11. January 8, 2008

    Editors Note:
    JH Peru novel

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