Beware: Only enter hipster hangout Tonic if you’re wearing skinny jeans, canvas sneaks, or a tight, pre-owned T-shirt–otherwise, go eat in Cleveland Park. This long and narrow bar caters to locals with more than a wings-and-burgers menu, but don’t be so enticed with non-bar options that you ignore beef patties with such fun toppings as guacamole and mashed potatoes with gravy, served alongside now-trendy–but delicious–tater tots. If you don’t dig on the meat, the roasted portabella mushroom sandwich and veggie burger will fill your carnivorous void. However, if you’re trying to eliminate a weekend hangover, do not patron Tonic–the service can be aggravatingly slow. For: A front-row view of the hipster life, Napoleon’s tots included.
Entrees: $8-$16. 202-986-7661. 3155 Mt. Pleasant St, NW [SG]
Originally in the Onion / DC local edition / June 14, 2007