Pizza

by BS

Who is the Eater of the Year?

Each year, Endless Simmer asks our loyal readers to vote on which person deserves the coveted title Eater of the Year. Past winners include Anthony Bourdain, Hezbollah Tofu, This is Why You’re Fat and Ruth Bourdain. So who made the biggest splash in the food world in 2011? The nominees are…

Herman Cain

Maybe it didn’t work out in the end, but you have to admit, there’s something admirable about a man who isn’t afraid to say that running the nation’s 36th best pizza chain qualifies you to run for president. In fact, there isn’t much at all Herman Cain is afraid to say. In a world where presidential politicians deep-throat corn dogs in public and then retreat to their campaign bus for lobster thermidor, it was refreshing to have an honest eater in the race, at least for awhile. Herman Cain wasn’t afraid to sing about his love for crappy fast food, or to declare that only sissy men put vegetables on their pizza. He wasn’t afraid to eat chicken wings win Michele Bachmann, or to propse that poor people don’t need food stamps because they can just buy used food. How is this man not already eater-in-chief? Just hope he never asks you to dinner. (Photo: Broward Palm Beach New Times)

Epic Meal Time

We can all acknowledge that the Food Network is pure shite nowadays, and there hasn’t been a food show worth watching since Cookin’ with Coolio. What the teevee execs don’t seem to get is that Americans don’t want 30 minute meals or cutesy casserole recipes. We want WORLD RECORD BREAKING FOOD.

Enter Epic Meal Time, the web TV show that ate all of the other web TV shows and then burped them up. Fancy an 84-egg sandwich? Meatloaf made out of McDonald’s? A Christmas tree crafted from bacon? EMT’s outrageous creations make state fair food look like a tea party hosted by Gwyneth Paltrow, and we just can’t look away. The ultra-American eaters dirty little secret? They’re Canadian.

The Lawrence/Julie & Julia Project

When Julia Child said she was going to use television to teach Americans how to cook French cuisine properly, people laughed at her, but she became a foodie legend. When Julie Powell said she was going to cook every recipe in Julia Child’s Mastering the Art of French Cooking and record it all on something called a weblog, people just thought she was weird, but she became a blog-to-book-to-big-screen phenomenon. When college student Lawrence Dai decided he was going to watch Julie & Julia every day for a year, people immediately realized he was a genius. Yes, the Lawrence/Julie & Julia Project had all the hallmarks of a jokey web project that wouldn’t last more than 15 minutes, but Lawrence actually did it, watching J&J a full 365 times, and firmly proving that online journalism does indeed have a purpose.

Attack of the Meme: The ’90s Are Back

In times of heartache and unrest we reach for nostalgia to calm our shattered souls. And apparently the 1990s heals our collective hearts, as plenty of Boy Meets World and Family Matters references dot the internet.

But my favorite ’90s poster child is Daria and how she decodes the world via food.

3. Dating Advice

(Photo: Creestool)

Pizza: Now a Vegetable and a Sleeping Bag

Pizza found itself in the press this week when Congress caved to the food lobbies – and ignored the health of the nation’s children – and agreed that pizza, with just a splattering of tomato paste, can count as a vegetable in school lunches. Total horse dung and totally watch Jamie Oliver mock the hell out of it.

Anyway, I’m here to restore pizza’s reputation. Because now the beloved slice can provide even more comfort: as a sleeping bag.

(Photo: The Clearly Dope)

in Trends / Veggie 4 comments

by BS

Imagine There’s No Pizza

Mr. and Mrs. O still get points for all their D.C. burger eating adventures, but Herman Cain just took a BIG lead in the race for the coveted Endless Simmer presidential endorsement.

in Politics 0 comments

by gansie

The Endless Road Trip: Philadelphia’s Top 10 Eats 6. A Stand-Up Slice

Very few truths remain intact through adulthood. Televised wrestling proved to be acting, although my across-the-street neighbor Anthony always told me so, but I never believed him.

I also thought a slice of NY/NJ cheese pizza beat any other type of pizza. While that is mostly still true, throw an egg on a pie and the story changes.

A sunny side up egg frequents plenty of pizzas these days, as well as many other unusual ingredients. In fact, I’d say most “gourmet” pies become overloaded, creating soggy crusts and a dreaded fork-and-knife induced experience. Complicated pizzas rarely work.

Philadelphia’s Barbuzzo selected the right mix of flavors and textures to create a simple and addictive pie: Brussels sprout leaves scattered across a cheesy, truffle-oiled disk, dotted with guanciale. Diced pig jowl posed as garnish, a modern and effective way to use the most out of a moderate amount of meat.

The yolk arrived already nicked, ensuring that the egg ran all over the pizza. This oft-overlooked detail—hellloooo 8 out of 10 of my last Eggs Benedict orders—is much appreciated. And in a balancing feat, the crust stays stiff, letting the utensils sit this course out.

It’s enough to make me believe in the tooth fairy.

The Endless Road Trip: Philadelphia

1. There Will Be Blood…and Beets
2. Soup Dumpling Surprise
3. Cheesesteaks Gone Wild!
4. Duck in a Pot
5. Pretzels, Pretzels Everywhere
6. A Stand-Up Slice
7. Love on the Run
8. A Plate of Cheese and a Pail of Grapes
9. The New Cupcakes
10. Tastykake Taste Test

in Cheese / Eggs / Pig / Restaurants 1 comments

by gansie

Attack of the Meme: Ryan Gosling is a Farmers Market-Loving Feminist

Ryan Gosling is a feminist, well, on Tumblr that is. On Feminist Ryan Gosling, the adorably scruffy actor weaves together gender studies, Cocoa Puffs, pizza and tacky come-ons in this brainy, funny and drool-worthy satirical look at a hunk that loves feminist theory.

(Photo: Feminist Ryan Gosling)

in Celebs 1 comments

by gansie

Ink Worthy Eats: Top 10 Food Tattoos, Part 2

With heatwaves come lots of skin. And these days, lots of skin comes with tons of ink. It seems the days of tramp stamps, tribal signs and Chinese characters have given way to our new national pastime: food. Here’s our 2nd sampling of indulgent food tattoos.