Fart Without Fear

We don’t hype a lot of cookbooks here at ES because, well, they’re all so boring. In fact, if I get one more press release along the lines of Learn to Cook Family Favorite in 20 Minutes or Less! I’m going to barf all over my laptop. But once in a blue moon we get one that actually sounds like our style. Clearly, Fart Without Fear falls into that category.

Now this is not your run of the mill anti-farting cookbook. FWF is not here to tell you to forgo the black bean nachos or the macaroni and cheese pizza. Come on, we wouldn’t do that to you. Nor do they share instructions on how to make these fatty foods flatulent-free. We all know that’s not possible. No, this is much more complex that that. Instead, Fart Without Fear promises a more attainable goal — 70 comfort food recipes that the book’s authors swear result only in the less offensive kind of farting, i.e. weeding out the ingredients that result in “bad flatulence (a. k .a. smelly farts, silent but deadlies, air biscuits, backdoor trumpets, poots, etc.)” They promise their recipes will show readers how to:

Reduce the pungent, eye-tearing, sulfur-laden farts from recipes for breakfarts, loaded lunches, oop soups, sneaky snacks, appetooters, side splitters, dangerous dinners, and deadly desserts…Decide which ones to prepare using the authors’ very own scientifically based and politically incorrect rating system, the Original Boston Baked Bean Odor Index.

Finally, a cookbook that actually wants to help.

Color Me Hungry

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Almost a decade ago my family and I traveled to Durango, Colorado for my cousin’s wedding. I’d never been out West before and I remember thinking how insanely different everything looked and felt. I decided, while staring out of the hotel window at a mountain range, that I’m a city person. I’d rather look at buildings. I’d rather be surrounded by tall steel and crowded streets than lonely nature.

In those ten years I’ve seen plenty of cities and gorgeous buildings and cramped sidewalks. But now, my deep appreciation for food forces me to better acknowledge the brilliance of nature.

Like, seriously, how the fuck did the Grand Canyon come about? I’m still confused. That thing is enormous. And scary. Totally insane. I think about my few hours in its presence and I’m shocked, humbled, amazed.

Nature also impresses me in the every day with its color coding abilities: similarly hued vegetables contain similar nutrients, vitamins and healing properties. I knew orange colored veggies could help with cancer prevention but I hadn’t mastered the rest of the colors. Enter Color Me Vegan by Colleen Patrick-Goudreau.

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Have You Eaten Meat Today?

ES fav Kim O’Donnel, aka The Notorious KOD, refuses meat on Mondays. And she’s a goddamn meat lover. Meatless Mondays, in my opinion, might just help save the planet. Or at least extend humans’ time on it.

O’Donnel’s ode to Meatless Mondays, The Meat Lovers Meatless Cookbook, will be published in September. Above is her rant on why we should give cows and pigs and shrimp a day off.

I’m Not Familiar

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Sundays at the Eastern Market flea market feature a few cooking related vendors, at least they did six years ago. There was this one vendor, a bearded man in his 60s, with a massive collection of old cookbooks and an even older collection of cast iron pans. I indulged in both.

Let me be clear though, six years ago I didn’t know a fucking thing about food. I didn’t know about cookware or ingredients or experts. I did know, however, that I needed to learn more than what I picked up by casually watching 30 Minute Meals after work.

One very thick cookbook stood out in the bearded man’s collection with its firm tone and streamlined recipes. I flipped through the pages thinking this could be a great, general cook book. The bearded man asked me, as I kept flipping, “Do you have any of his cookbooks at home? Familiar with James Beard?”

“No,” I smiled, “I’m not familiar.”

He encouraged me to buy it. And so I took home the 1981 version of The New James Beard and read it like a novel, well, a novel’s sequel. That fucker James Beard is clever.

In his recipe for “Chicken Salad with Fresh Coriander” (side note: he calls cilantro “Chinese parsley”), Beard  instructs: “Roast the chicken according to directions in Theory & Practice (page 83)” and then proceeds with the duration of the recipe.

I’m not sure if he assumes everyone already owns his previous book or he wanted to boost his sales, or both, but I went back to Eastern Market. The bearded vendor stocked it. I bought it. Both Beards won.

I take out New everyone once in a while when I’m looking to cook something basic, like rice. Or want some inspiration for a new way to cook a vegetable. Beard didn’t disappoint as I made the best fucking cucumbers of all time.

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The Lovely Bits

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I sat there on the floor. Five rows of bookshelves mocking my single request. I wanted to make a cabbage and potato hash. I pulled four books. One had a hash recipe, but not what I wanted.

The night before I ate dinner at my friend, and fellow food writer, Scott‘s place. He follows recipes. He really follows recipes. Like doesn’t take this from that recipe, and this from that other recipe, and this from that imagination. His secret: good cookbooks.

I also think I own pretty good cookbooks, it just depends on the order. I have something in mind and then turn to a cookbook hoping to find the recipe. I invariably don’t. Then turn to the internet. Mis-match a few different recipes, throwing in some creativity, and usually figure out how to make it work. To get the best use out of cookbooks, you have to start at the recipe. A good recipe. Then buy ingredients. Or that’s what Scott thinks.

I borrowed his Indian cookbook, from which he made a few dishes for a Sunday night rooftop dinner. I’ve pledged to follow one of those recipes. Perfectly.

Until then. I kinda screwed up a hash.

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Follow the Leader: Not a Smashing Good Time

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Back in November or December I G-chatted BS and declared I had an awesome New Years’ Resolution. It would benefit my bookshelves and the blog. Every week I would cook a recipe from one of the 50+ cookbooks I owned. Sure, the one my brother bought me from Amsterdam that was a Spanish tapas cookbook written in Dutch would be a little tough, but, um, yea, I could make the gist of the resolution work.

It’s now March and I just started to pull out my many sources of recipes. On Monday night, like I said before, I pulled out my Bon Appetit and Gourmet magazines from 2009 (note: I haven’t renewed/bought any subscriptions for 2010), plus Bon Apps 770 cookbook. I used the book’s UNrecipe for roasted parsnips, and incorporated it with spinach, ricotta and onions. But I also wanted something else. I needed a proper starch. I used Gourmet’s Panfried Smashed Potatoes.

Get this – I followed the directions.

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