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by Russell Warnick

Eatin’ Me Some Emu

NYE 2009 took me to the West Coast, where a couple of friends, my other half and I rented a cute little house in the Santa Ynez Valley near the Danish village of Solvang, which is famous for its wine, windmills, rolling mountains and the awful movie Sideways.

I could write about how beautiful the scenery was and how amazing the wines we tasted were but that really isn’t interesting compared to the amazing find I discovered — Ostrichland USA. In between Solvang and Buellton in the Santa Ynez Valley, this place is easy to miss, but well worth seeking out if only to gawk at the horrendously ugly and aggressive creatures that are the ostrich and emu, certainly a photo moment. But feeding these beasts and photo opportunities is not all this place has to offer…the foodie in me kicked in the moment I saw these monsters. I hit the brakes, turned the car around and said, “I want to eat that.”

by Russell Warnick

Haiti Food Relief

We wanted to take a moment to bring to you a few of the charities that are providing relief to the people of Haiti, specifically those providing food aid to those whose lives have been devastated by the 7.0 earthquake that hit Port-au-Prince on Tuesday.

World Food Program has deployed to Haiti. The agency has sent 86 metric tons of food to provide half a million emergency meals, in addition to high energy biscuits to those without access to cooking facilities. For more information go to www.wfp.org

Operation USA is an international aid agency that is providing health care, food supplements and water purification for the people of Haiti. To learn more and ways to donate go to www.opusa.org

Food for the Poor works in Latin America and the Caribbean improving the economic, health and social lives of the people it serves. Food for the Poor is sending a crew to Haiti and they are leaving the morning of January 14 and flying to the Dominican Republic. Helicopters will take them to Haiti, to donate go to www.foodforthepoor.org

American Red Cross has a simple way to donate, text “Haiti” to 90999 and $10 will be charged to your cell phone bill. All proceeds will go directly to sending supplies and staff to Haiti, in addition to the $1 million dollars ARC has already contributed to Haiti relief. You can also go to redcross.org

Of course the are the other major aid agencies, The International Committee of the Red Cross, Medecins sans Frontieres, Clinton Foundation, Yele and CARE.

in Personal 1 comments

by Russell Warnick

Burns My Bacon: Hey Hey, Ho Ho, That Lettuce Leaf Has Got To Go

I’m an appetizer kinda guy. There is nothing more satisfying than ordering a couple of apps instead of an entree; the variety alone makes the trip worth it. However, there are many downfalls in ordering apps. The quality can be somewhat diminished: fried and often just thrown on a plate without much thought. Despite that, bar apps are my favourite, especially potato skins, nachos and chicken tenders. All deliciously fattening!

My biggest gripe with appetizer dishes is the presentation, mainly lettuce. Why does the kitchen feel the need to serve my chicken, potato skins, guacamole, shrimp…On a bed of lettuce? This makes absolutely no sense to me whatsoever. If there is a reason for this please enlighten me, but for the time being I’m going to bitch…

in Personal / Rants & Raves 16 comments

by Bliz

Putting It All on the Line

We’ll it’s been far too long ES readers. I sure have missed the Endless Simmer gang and the requisite bacon-themed snarkiness!

Please forgive the absence, but in fairness, I’ve been kinda busy. After all these years of tinkering around in my own kitchen, building the cookbook collection and even writing about the exploits on the Interwebs, I decided to put up or shut up. So I took a full-time cooking job working the line in a real restaurant (a good one), with real line cooks (that speak mostly in Spanish and just call me ‘gringo’), with real chefs screaming at me about how awful my shit looks (really awful. I still fuck up a lot). No culinary school, no previous experience, just trial by fire…very much literally.

But I knew most of that going in. What really surprised me while making the shift from my lazy 9-5 to my new, bone-crushing post was how many fellow aspiring chefs out there in Yuppieland admitted to having their own dreams about giving up their 401(k)s, social lives, mental stability, weekends and all major holidays so they can work a lot more and earn a lot less.

So I figured I’d offer a few observations about the last few months of my life and put a little unsolicited advice out there for anyone hoping to make an appearance on Top Chef 16. My own little Kitchen Confidential if you will…except without the heroin…at least for the moment anyway.

in Personal / Restaurants 8 comments

by gansie

An Unopened Letter

An eternity of regret.

in Personal 2 comments

by gansie

Honky Tonk Princess

Fuck. So I’m back at work now. But at least I have these so-so photos from my iPhone to remember my looooong road trip from Atlanta to Hartsville to Nashville to Knoxville to Kingsport and back to DC. Let me walk you through my trip, via food, of course.

Toured World of Coca-Cola. (Atlanta)

I learned a few things. Sex in different language sells. Coke’s secret formula has nothing to do with taste. Chile’s Lift is the best soft drink in South America. I paid $45 for 80P, 80P’s Mom and me to be brainwashed into drinking Coke for the rest of our lives. And it was worth it.

Met a top chef. (Atlanta)

Met another top chef. (Atlanta)

Ate Sonic for the first time. (Somewhere off the highway in Monteagle, Tennessee)

Don’t worry. I didn’t eat that enormous chili cheese dog pictured above (80 did!). I try to avoid meat and fast food. Shockingly, though, the mozzarella sticks were awesome. And the black and white shake, even better. Actually, get this.

We all know what a black and white shake is, right? So I wake up drunk on New Years Day, giggle my ass off for an hour, start to feel crappy, head to a diner and try to order a milkshake on my way out. And my fucking server looks at me like I’m insane. She took a triple take. And she goes, “Um, like put them on top of each other?”

What the fuck? What would that even mean? I clearly did not order a milkshake from that establishment.

in Drinks / Holiday / Personal / Photos 8 comments

by Maids

Monday’s Chickpeas, Yesterday’s Pants

I’m writing today with a rather profound problem. The problem (which has manifested itself on a rather regular basis ever since I became distracted and engrossed in four simultaneous projects that have nothing whatsoever to do with cooking) finally crystallized for me a few nights back when I was over at my friend Alice’s place.

Alice complained that sometimes as she gets dressed in the morning she’s worried that she’s wearing “Yesterday’s pants” or “Last Friday’s Hair.” She has to think on it a little and go back through the Rolodex in her mind of the clothes she has worn and the styles she has sported over the last 5 or so days to make sure she’s not in repeat mode.

I have a similar problem, but it has nothing to do with clothes. More and more often I find that I’m using Monday’s chickpeas in Wednesday’s four bean stew, or Tuesday’s broccoli in Thursday’s pasta. Do you get my drift? It’s not quite cheating I suppose, but I’m rather embarrassed by it, and it worries me. I’m afraid I’m becoming a dull and forgetful cook. I’m worried Romeo will notice. I’m worried that this reusing (and sometimes recycling!) of ingredients is becoming an endemic trend in my kitchen that might turn me off of cooking altogether, or cause the main consumers of my cooking to ease their hunger at other troughs…

in Personal / Rants & Raves 9 comments

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