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by BS

Plantains Three Ways

Fruit is pretty great and all, but how much better is it when deep-fried? Am I right?

Well, I know I am. Having grown up on Nuyorican restaurants, I’ve been a pretty rabid plantain fan for a long time. But one longtime frustration was that I could not, for the life of me, figure out how to recreate these delicious little fritters at home. But, after much experimentation and web browsing, I’m happy to report I’ve started to get the hang of it. The secret turns out to be the same secret as every other delicious restaurant food: you’ve got to throw all delusions of semi-healthiness to the wind. Oil, baby. Lots of it. Like seriously, gallons. Cooking plantains in a tablespoon or two of oil always resulted in bland, starchy discs with not-quite-right texture, but once I worked up the courage to really douse them in oil, I’ve been able to make both sweet, rich plantains from super-ripe bananas, as well as crispy, more hearty ones from green bananas.

You don’t necessarily need a deep-fryer, but you need to cut those plantains thin, fill your saucepan up with a whole lot of the golden stuff, get it nice and bubbly, then let ’em fry for just a few minutes.

That dilemma solved, obviously I was ready to start getting a little wacky. As much as I love eating plain crispy plantains with the simple garlic sauce they serve at Puerto Rican places, I wondered if they couldn’t stand for a little spicing up at home, so I took three different attempts at crafting a more creative plantain. No, this is not a lame, haute cusine “three-way” dish, but merely three different ways they can be prepared…

by tvff

Top 10 Jersey Shore Foods

Like it or not, MTV’s new reality train wreck Jersey Shore has vaulted that curious species, the self-identified “Guido” into the public consciousness, much to the dismay of New Jerseyans, Italian-Americans and anyone with an IQ above 78. I know…you thought these Guidos and “Guidettes” were just another figment of the New Jersey imagination like the Jersey Devil and affordable real estate. As much as I would like to pretend idiots like this don’t exist, I’m afraid that anyone who has spent significant time in the Garden State — including natives like gansie and myself — has some across an example of the species, typically traveling in a pack. And now they are beamed right to your home by the magic of television. Consider it payback for the state providing you with a setting for the best show of the past ten years, The Sopranos. Gotta pay the piper sooner or later.

This joyous television experience got us thinking, though: Man does not live on soy protein, Axe Body Spray and Miller Lite alone. The Jersey shore offers a cornucopia of wonderful, horrible and wonderfully-horrible food products that will hopefully all make cameos during the season. Let this handy list of the Top 10 Jersey Shore Foods be your guide to understanding the culinary choices available to the cast.

10. Mack & Manco Pizza

Pizza is a staple of Jersey boardwalk fare, and Ocean City’s Mack & Manco is the best on the promenade. This is a decidedly NYC-style pie — the big floppy kind that you can fold in half and chow down on while you walk. Unlike the trash that drifts down to Jersey to participate on the show, this is one NYC import we can all enjoy. (Photo: Infinite Jeff)

9. Dippin’ Dots

The future of ice cream! Or so they’ve been telling us for the past twenty five years. At what point will the future actually get here so I can throw out my Ben & Jerry’s? These ice-cold globules used to be a “special occasion” item that you would see for sale at the shore. These days, I can buy them from a machine at the mall. Kinda takes the charm out of it. (Photo: newwavegurly)

8. Salt Water Taffy

All the nutritional value of a conversation with Mike “The Situation,” these chewy treats are the bane of brace-wearing children everywhere. Each box always includes some bullshit story about how the taffy was invented when candy fell into seawater, but you’re mostly just interested in getting the good flavors and shafting your siblings with the banana and licorice. Corn syrup + artificial flavoring = awesome. (Photo: Live?Laugh?Love)

7. Boardwalk Fries

These things are so good that they made a mediocre fast food franchise out of them! The signs that say the fries are cooked in “100% peanut oil” were tantalizingly exotic to a third grader in the 1980s (yeah, my horizons have expanded since then), and the fact that they sliced the potatoes on premises made it even more fun. The medium-cut sticks are great for the most part — the fries that you get from the center of the potatoes are long and perfectly cooked — but the unfortunate slices that are nicked off the edges invariably lead to a pile of deep-fried potato skins in the bottom of your paper cup. Bummer. (Photo: roboppy)

6. Binge Drinking

Sure, it’s not technically a food item, but it does account for approximately 56% of the total calories consumed at the Jersey shore. In fact, I think that national Beer Pong Championships are held in Wildwood Crest. (Photo: C o l i n)

Next: Top 5 Jersey Shore Foods

in Desserts / Featured / Fish / Lists / Top 10 Lists / TV 23 comments

by gansie

To Straw or Not to Straw

Everything is better with a straw.

As a kid, straws indicated a special moment. There would be straws when my family went out to eat. Sometimes I’d even manage to score two: one for my water and one for my coke. When I was sick my grandmother would bring me ginger ale with a straw. And one of my favorite desserts–a black and white milkshake—also came with a straw (although it’d usually be a double-team job with the help of a spoon.)

As I got older, straws made less appearances. But at some point in my post-college life, it changed. I started drinking beer with a straw. It also doesn’t matter the type of brew; I drink both Miller Lites and Beamish from a straw.

For some reason this offends the shit out of people. Strangers will not only glare at me, or tilt their head in confusion, but will question my morals.

And if fellow bar patrons don’t think I’m flunking the beer rules test, then they assume I use the straw to get drunk faster. Really, though, it’s because I’m an LPS (my dad’s abbrievation: lazy piece of shit) and couldn’t be bothered lifting the glass to my mouth. I’d rather bend my neck slightly to reach the tip of the straw. It’s so much easier with a straw. And to be honest, it’s also quite delicious.

This straw madness may have gone too far recently. I was out on a date and I started drinking a martini with that tiny black stirrer. Fine, it looked ridiculous. But do you know how dangerous it is to handle a cone shaped vehicle filled with expensive liquid when it’s already my 5th drink of the night?

Anyway. I’m perfectly proud of my straw usage. I wouldn’t mind some backing though. Any secret straw-ers out there?

in Drinks / Featured / Rants & Raves 16 comments

by gansie

Curry Cauliflower and Coconut Milk Soup

It’s countdown time. But not just for the bird. In my household there are other things a-brewin’.

80P has a monster paper due by the end of today. In preparation, he has been consuming plenty of caffeine (coke and tea), grease (pizza) and salt (tortilla chips.) He can handle the mounting calories.

I, on the other hand, am facing another type of demon. This Saturday is my 10 year high school reunion. Eek! So while 80 is lovingly gorging on the tastiest calories, I’ve been trying to banish those foods for the past few days AND the coming few days.

Tonight 80’s pizza looked so amazingly shiny and beautiful. But I passed. I did however, end up making a mighty delicious meal for myself though, minus the bubbling cheese. If you’re also trying to keep it light before the big day of eating, I highly suggest a soup thickened with pureed vegetables.

in Featured / Recipe / Veggie 1 comments

by Bliz

Friday Fuck Ups: The Illusive Fried Shrimp Head

A funny thing happened a few weeks back. And I have to say I’m still a little shocked I’m actually saying this, but credit where credit is due. A few Sundays back, Food Network actually did something that kinda blew my mind.

As much trash talk as I dish out on Food Network programming, this new show of theirs, The Best Thing I Ever Ate is pretty damn good. It probably also helped that the episode I caught just happened to be the Best Fried food tribute. I’m sure there are other lovely categories, but an entire show dedicated to the wondrous variety of fried foods is without question one of FN’s better attempts to win over viewers.

It was Duff’s obsession with the apparently abundant but never advertised part of an animal we rarely think about eating: shrimp heads. Fried shrimp heads. A whole basket of them! I knew immediately that I had to learn how to make these little delicacies. And that’s pretty much when everything starts to go down hill…

in Featured 14 comments

by BS

The Ultimate NYC Hot Dog Crawl

Wherever you live, you’re surely familiar with the lure of The New York Hot Dog. And if you consume any kind of food media, you’re also probably aware that there’s no longer any reason to limit your NYC hot dog intake to those slimy wieners sold from carts in Central Park – or even to the recession special at Gray’s Papaya. Hot dogs are this year’s comfort food gone gourmet, and every hot NYC chef seems to be adding the once humble frankfurter to their repertoire, usually topping it with something new and more outrageous than the last guy.

Over at Oyster Local this week, I took a look at four of the best new high-end hot-dog shops in Greenwich Village, which inspired me to dig a little deeper and come up with this list of NYC’s best new gourmet hot dogs (along with a few classic stops) for the ultimate, 20-link New York Hot Dog Crawl. No, I have not actually completed this crawl, at least not all in one day, but if anyone’s up for the challenge I think I have a few free Sundays coming up. Let’s all just make sure our health insurance is up-to-date first.

1. Nathan’s Famous

Duh! The basic classic, just for starters. 1310 Surf Avenue, Brooklyn (Photo: Meg Zimbeck)

2. Willie’s Dawgs

Park Slope gets a little crazy with Niman Ranch beef dogs (or tofu ones — this is Park Slope, after all) stuffed in challah or rye rolls and finished with some inspired toppings like baked beans and salsa. 351 Fifth Ave., Brooklyn (Photo: Stumptown Panda)

3. Bark Hot Dogs

Gourmet hot dogs get the brownstone Brooklyn treatment, sourced from locally-raised meats, doused in a classed-up cheese sauce, served in an eco-friendly environ, and paired with Six Point ales. 474 Bergen St., Brooklyn (Photo: Cherrypatter)

4. Smoke Joint

Fort Greene’s favorite BBQ spot brings the hot meat-on-meat action by topping a Black Angus dog with pulled pork, beef or chicken (and some homemade coleslaw). I know you can’t see much of the dog, but trust me, it’s worth the mouth-work to get there. 87 S. Eliott Place, Brooklyn (Photo: Senorjerome)

5. Asia Dog

New York’s hippest hot doggery is, of course, not one restaurant but a rotating curated party for those in the know. These bahn mi dogs are found at Williamsburg’s Trophy Bar, but only on Tuesday nights. They also pop up elsewhere in Brooklyn and LES throughout the week. 351 Broadway, Brooklyn, On Tuesdays. (Photo: LadyDucayne)

6. San Antonio Bakery 2

Slip into Queens for the Chilean take on hot dogs: slathered with avocado puree, mayo, onions, tomato, and just a little bit of hot salsa, on a crusty homemade bun. 3620 Astoria Blvd., Queens (Photo: Pabo76)

7. Frankie’s Franks

Like the marathon, we’ll dip into the Bronx for a moment just to say we did. At FF’s, you get two fried hot dogs stuffed in one roll, topped with onions, peppers, AND potatoes. They actually call this a Jersey-style dog; I’m not sure if that’s authentic Jerz, but that’s a whole ‘nother post!) 2330 Arthur Ave., The Bronx (Photo: Kay::Snyder)

8. Fatty Crab

Hotshot chef Zak Pelaccio makes the case for the $13 hot dog: homemade pork sausage topped with pickled chilies, cucumber, radish and cilantro, then laced with a spicy Asian aioli and stuffed in a toasted potato bun. 2170 Broadway (Photo: Scaredy_kat)

9. Brooklyn Diner

When size matters, it’s hard to beat the foot-plus-long frank served at this midtown Manhattan (confusingly, not Brooklyn) institution. The 15-inch dawg comes on a comically small but beautifully buttery bun, along with onion rings, relish, mustard and kraut. 212 W. 57th St. (Photo: Jeffery and Rachel Vanneste)

Continue Reading: the next ten hot dogs

in Bacon / Cheese / Eggs / Featured / Fowl / Pig / Red Meat / Restaurants 14 comments

by Russell Warnick

Breadless BLT

Living a block from the 14 & U St. Farmers Market and working a few blocks from the White House Farmers Market there is little reason for me to venture to any of the other markets in the city, unless of course ES’ own Gansie is working it. This past Saturday I battled the rain and headed north to Mt. Pleasant, and let me tell you, the weather was not so pleasant. The market might be smaller than most in the city but it doesn’t stop short of selling everything the others do, I went in search of chili peppers for a cook-off at work- but that’s for another post.

As I was perusing for the great deal on habaneros, poblanos and jalapeños, my eye wandered over to the fresh meats, since I needed some beef round for my chili. Instead it was the bacon that caught my eye, naturally. A whole slab of bacon, I’d seen these before but not really thought much of it, I bought some anyway figuring I could make a delicious treat- and that I did.

Before heading home I went over to Gansie to show her what I had bought and she too marveled at the bacon, immediately, without hesitation she suggested I make a breadless BLT, and without hesitation, I said OK.

in Bacon / Breakfast / Endless Bacon / Featured / Recipe / Sandwich 4 comments