A.D.D. + Cinnamon Toast Crunch

Homework sucks. Call it burn-out from sixteen years of school. Call it A.D.D.

Nevertheless, I admit to munching on high-sugar kid’s cereal for something to do and wonder: we really ate this for breakfast when we were kids?? No wonder we begged for it, crying and screaming in the grocery store aisles–this shit is freakin’ candy. The cinnamon sugar is coating my fingers and my laptop keyboard.

Wendell, Bob, and Quello (WTF?), the Cinnamon Toast Crunch bakers, certainly did know how to market sugar to children. Like giving candy to a baby…literally. And how noble of them to use “less sugar” than “other kids’ cereals.” There were cereals with more sugar??

Bob and Quello were fired somewhere along the way, and Wendell has been left to grace the box alone. And now, to entice the kids during modern, less-than-stellar Saturday morning cartoonage, the crazy cinnamon sugar squares just eat each other and burp. Nice.

What was your favorite high-sugar kids’ cereal? You know, the one that made you bounce off the walls in school and then crash around 10 AM. You know, the one that was partially responsible for your A.D.D…