PHOTO: Cage Skidmore
Last night we heard from President Trump in a joint session. Trump brought up building our own “great, great wall”. Then we got to thinking – this is tame compared to what he’s said in the past! For the remainder of the speech, I thought about two things: (1) the ridiculous “trumpisms” made in the past and (2) what if food trucks were named after the “trumpisms”? And there ya go – that’s how you get through Presidential addresses. So after some good thought, a glass of wine, and the droning of politicians, we bring you the top ten food trucks (and slogans) Donald Trump would get behind.
1. One Bad Hombre’s Burrito Stand
– “If you’re legal, stop on by!”
2. Deplorable Donuts
– “We got baskets upon baskets!”
3. “Beyond the Wall” Tacos
– “The first one’s on Mexico!”
4. BRILLIANT Waffles and Ice Cream
– “Believe me, they’re wonderful. You’re gonna love it.”
5. Putin’s Potato Pancakes and Pierogies
– “Made as if we didn’t even know him.”
6. Grab ’em By the Pita
– “Just like in the locker room.”
7. Make Cupcakes Great Again
– “Draining the swamp one cupcake at a time, believe me.”
8. “Believe Me” Bagels and More
– “We make BILLIONS of them, believe me.”
9. So WRONG They Are Right Falafels
– “WRONG! Unless you’re eating here, believe me.”
10. YOU’RE FIRED Charcoal Grill and BBQ
– “You’ll move on our BBQ like a bitch, believe me.”