Who Wants Some Man Meat?

manmeat

The Situation

When I started dating my boyfriend back in July, he mentioned he and his friends have this New Year’s Eve tradition of getting together and cooking “exotic” meats. I ignored this story at first because I assumed he 1) wouldn’t be around in December and 2) wouldn’t invite me. Somehow, it turns out he is still around and invited me. This can’t be my life?

At about 2pm on New Year’s Eve, the man gchatted me and told me he was in charge of cooking the meats, so we’d have to come up with recipes in a few hours’ time with limited ingredients since ALL STORES WERE CLOSED BY THE TIME THEY DECIDED TO THINK ABOUT RECIPES. Well, not really, but I was in my robe and had just painted my nails and wasn’t planning on leaving the house until the stores were closed. I sent out an SOS on Twitter and madly googled for some reliable sources.

The meats:
Ground ostrich, 1lb
Caribou steaks, 2lbs
Alligator filets, 2lbs

8 Tips for Cooking Game Meat

1) Cook game like a similarly textured meat.
This is a little obvious, isn’t it? Try to cook the meat like another similar meat you already know how to cook. The results might not be perfect the first time, but it will probably be damn good.

2) Drink more.
This cuts back on the nervousness and lets the creative meat juices flow.

3) Taste often.
If you’re drinking before dinner, you should probably eat something. Why not taste the meat you’re cooking? This lets you know if it tastes like shit and whether or not you have to proceed with step #4.

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Eatin’ Me Some Emu

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NYE 2009 took me to the West Coast, where a couple of friends, my other half and I rented a cute little house in the Santa Ynez Valley near the Danish village of Solvang, which is famous for its wine, windmills, rolling mountains and the awful movie Sideways.

I could write about how beautiful the scenery was and how amazing the wines we tasted were but that really isn’t interesting compared to the amazing find I discovered — Ostrichland USA. In between Solvang and Buellton in the Santa Ynez Valley, this place is easy to miss, but well worth seeking out if only to gawk at the horrendously ugly and aggressive creatures that are the ostrich and emu, certainly a photo moment. But feeding these beasts and photo opportunities is not all this place has to offer…the foodie in me kicked in the moment I saw these monsters. I hit the brakes, turned the car around and said, “I want to eat that.”

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