Friday Fuck Up Redeemed: Tomato and Egg Success Story

On Friday I left you with my most recent Fuck Up (and a discussion on whether or not we should continue using the word fuck). I’m awfully glad I did, because we actually figured out why my open omelet, which I’ve successfully made before, turned to mushy, gross shit.

Last week I started the egg dish with the tomatoes warming on the pan, oozing out all sorts of acidic liquid. I added the eggs into that big, ol’ mess, and the eggs never set. I had no idea why. But from some reader advice here and on Facebook, I learned that I should add the tomato at the end.

Advice highlights:

Jenna: Did you de-seed your tomatoes? The omelet looks really watery, and the extra water from the tomatoes could cause the eggs to break like that. And then you’d be steaming the egg bits in their excess water, which would totally mess up the texture.

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Welcome Spring’s Simplicity

The cooking is easy this time of year. Spring offers much less variety than summer, which almost eliminates tough decision making at the farmers’ market. For me, I had to decide between buying three or four bundles of asparagus. In the summer it’ll be the a much more difficult choice of Japanese eggplants or pattypan squashes. I opted for three bundles and by Sunday night, two have been used.

I’ll know better next week.

Asparagus and Goat Cheese Open Omelet

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Just Two More Meals


With only two more meals left for Passover 2010, there’s the urge to never eat matzoh again, yet still use it all before its time is up. Matzoh as a cracker isn’t terrible, as I slathered on smoked whitefish salad and pushed raw onion and raw broccoli into the creamy mixture, simply topped with freshly ground black pepper. Matzoh is also tolerable as a base for melted cheese and salsa, as my sister discovered.

But I think matzoh is best when you can barely taste it at all. So, for you, the lonely observant Jews, for when every one else has longed reincorporated pizza and pasta into their diets, you have fought through the carb cravings and lasted until this eighth and final day. Here is a way to hide your matzoh.

Matzoh and Swiss Omelet

A few weeks ago at the farmers’ market I bought these long, slender greens that basically looked like grass. At the ends there was some barely leafy parts, but it mostly just looked like grass. And I totally can’t remember the name.

Nonetheless, I sliced it to about the size of my pinkie nail (currently painted in Essie’s Mint Candy Apple) and quickly softened it in a pan with butter. I then added in broken up matzoh bits, letting the matzoh also soften.

In a bowl I beat two eggs and threw in raw garlic. I poured the egg mixture over the greens and matzoh and tried to swipe around the sides to let the uncooked eggs start to cook. I seasoned the eggs with salt and pepper and then flipped the egg mixture over once the bottom started to firm up. I lowered the heat then tore up two slices of swiss and placed a lid over the pan. After about 2 minutes, the cheese still hadn’t melted and the eggs were starting to brown on the bottom.

I decided to flip it again, letting the cheese directly hit the pan. I was nervous that the cheese would burn, or stick. or the whole thing would get messed up. But I guess the cheese and butter had enough fat that the cheese slid around in the pan and was able to melt, but then also easily move to the plate.

Enjoy, especially not tasting the matzoh, which really only gives the open faced omelet some body and texture, but not that gross matzoh stale taste.

And now you can start thinking (if you haven’t already) how you’re going to break Passover.