An Open Letter to Padma

Dear Ms. Lakshmi,

I really hope that things are going well with you.  I only ask because, at the risk of being too blunt, I’m a little bit worried about you and your cash flow.

I was under the impression that you pretty much had it all.  You’re the host of the most popular food program on television.  You’re a successful model.  And you’ve even written a cookbook.  That’s amazing!  I’d guess that you’d probably be just rolling in cash.

Again, not to get too personal, but I’m not sure how much of an impact your recent, high-profile divorce may have had on your finances.  How does British divorce law work?  Apparently, your Ex is pretty well known, too, although all I really know about him is he doesn’t have many fans in the Middle East, that he had a cameo in that Renee Zellweger movie and he may or may not frequent saunas in Manhattan.  So, my guess is that it turns out to be a push financially.

Despite having all this going for you, (and the whole serial dating of billionaires thing) I get the feeling you may be short on money…

I say this because I saw the new Carl’s Jr.  commercial.  You know…the one that features you “enjoying” a hamburger.  The one with the licking and the oozing and the legs.  I watched it about a half hour ago and I still have the shakes.

It’s not that you shouldn’t be able to earn a little extra scratch by endorsing a product.  The problem is that you’re following in the footsteps of Paris Hilton.  How long until the poorly-lit home video?

I’m sure the product is wonderful…I wouldn’t know.  There aren’t any Carl’s Jr. restaurants here on the east coast.  I suppose that’s the trade off:  We don’t have ecstasy-inducing burgers but at least we have seasons.

So I won’t rag on you about pitching fast food hamburgers.  Hey, your co-host is already endorsing Diet Coke.  In fact, I have an idea!

If we can get Gail to hook up with the folks at Ore-Ida, the three of you can make an Extra Value Meal.

Love,
TVFF