Friday Fuck Ups: Apple Picking


I went apple picking a few weeks back and, well, it was okay.  We had to drive over an hour away—into Virginia?!?!— and well, manually pick apples.

goat-cheese_jam.jpg   apple-picking_hunting.jpg frittata.jpg

The snacking-before-picking was fun though.  Liza and I went to a press dinner at Urbana earlier in the week and as a parting gift got this bad ass mission fig jam, made by the chef using his family recipe.  I’m not usually a jam girl, but paired with goat cheese, spread on a baguette and eating it at an orchard—yea, I can handle a jam like that.  (Would love other suggestions for how to use up this jam.  Also, how long will it last in the fridge?)

After we stuffed ourselves (this is also where the fritattas came in) we used these lacrosse stick looking devices that had a comb thing to pull the apples off of the trees.  But every time I tried to snag one, they’d hit this inner part of the stick and tear a sliver of skin off.  And I’m not going to buy a pierced apple, so I just threw it on the ground.  That happened about 6 times before I gave up and just gossiped with El and Evo Diva (better known for her up-the-butt shenanigans) while another gaggle of girls kept pursuing the forbidden fruit.

Now for the fuck up. While we were eating every one was brainstorming about what they would create with a plethora of apples.  Here’s a first try from El:

from: El
to: gansie
subject: apples

Worked with puff pasty for the first time. Just got the frozen stuff at TJs.
TRIED to make an apple tart. Was kind of a disaster.
Burned the puff pastry.   🙁
I still ate some of it; after scraping the black off.
Will try again, hopefully with better results.
Also, i kind of fear my oven isn’t calibrated right. the past few things i’ve cooked according to the recipe and it’s been trouble (roasted chicken). i need to get an oven thermometer, me thinks.  i also didn’t do a “good recipe” for this. i actually didn’t really follow one. next time i plan on doing a little more to spice it up and then monitor it super well so it doens’t burn.  i’m gonna talk to my mom to see if she has any sage advice.


Keep trying, El!  And for everyone else, send us your fuck up stories—

You can also add your fuck ups—or successes—to our new Endless Simmer flickr pool.  Join the artsy photo fun and you may even get featured on ES.

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  • Maidelitala October 24, 2008  

    This is probably not news to anyone who knows me, but apples are seriously my favorite food in the world. They have been since I was a wee thing (I know this because in preschool we had to say our names to a beat and clap our hands and then say our favorite food and I said “apples and spaghetti” and my preschool teacher thought I ate apples and spaghetti and so she asked my parents what disgusting dish they made with apples and spaghetti, and they said they didn’t make any such dish, so they figured that really I just couldn’t choose between apples and spaghetti. Okay. That was your glimpse into my childhood for the day. Thought you’d appreciate it.

  • Mariah Carey October 24, 2008  

    I have a major eff up – that also includes apples. I made an apple crisp for my then boyfriend a few years ago. The recipe called for almond liquor but all I could find was almond extract so I used equal parts of it instead. WOW. That apple crisp was SO disgusting – the almond extract took the enamel off our teeth!

    I was mortified. Of course, being the sweet guy he is, he asked for seconds.

  • Evo Diva October 24, 2008  

    I really want to try canning the many, many apples that are still in my fridge’s veggie drawer. Any idea where I can get these supplies around town?

  • gansie October 24, 2008  

    great story, MC. almond extract sounds disgusting.

  • El October 24, 2008  

    1. Almond Extract: Fantastic in small quantities. I cannot imagine using it in large doses though!

    2. My “recipe”: I really didn’t do a whole lot to the apples. I squeezed lemon on the slices as I was cutting to avoid browning. To prep the puff pastry, I just thawed and poked holes in the bottom. I artfully arranged the apples slices, the sprinkled with sugar and brushed the top with butter.

    Following my Julia Child’s book, I cooked at about 425 for 15 minutes. The directions called for a total cooking time of almost 40 minutes! But at 15 the puff pastry was already turning brown. I covered with foil and continued to cook – as I assumed the apples would not be done after just 15 minutes. 10 minutes later I removed from the oven and the bottom and most of the top were black.

    Hoping to try again soon – hopefully with better results!

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