Put It In a Jar: White Sangria

I don’t know about the rest of you, but all weekend long I have been reaching, itching, longing for some crisp fall weather. I toiled for a while about what the hell to put in a jar this week. Fruit…again? I wanted comfort food. Something sweet, with chocolate…maybe some peanut butter and malt! Ok. OK. I told myself to get a grip. It’s August. I’ll have months and months of savory food up ahead. So, what did I decide to do instead…?

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Fast Food Copy Cat: Cherry Berry Chiller

Sometimes people unintentionally plant seeds in my brain. I have a sweet friend who is mildly obsessed with McDonald’s Cherry Berry Chiller and gets it on the daily. She mentioned it to me a total of 15 times last time I saw her.  So…now I’ve been obsessing. In my mind.

If you know me at all, you know I am not that into fast food, so I thought I’d make one myself. You know what? I think this is the first thing that I couldn’t just Google and make. So, I went to McD’s website and found that their chiller is made with such lovely ingredients as flavor concentrates, citric acid and xanthan gum. Sounds yummy, huh? Don’t even get me started on the calorie and sugar count. I could go on all day…

But I won’t. I will, however, present you with a fresh, homemade and all (OK, mostly) natural Cherry Berry Chiller! Get into it, y’all.

Copy Cat Cherry Berry Chiller

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Endless Poptails: Melon Berry Diablo

When someone tells you your food is “interesting,” is that the equivalent of being told you look homely?

It’s a shitty statement to make about someone’s food. And I had a pissed off look to follow after being told my cocktail popsicles were “interesting.” Maybe I’m too defensive—I know food is subjective.  But I still felt like shoving this popsicle in the guy’s face and asking him how interesting that way.

What he labeled interesting was this tequila-based, honeydew-body popsicle, which is  mixed with ginger beer and softly stirred with a raspberry cassis syrup, turning the classic Diablo cocktail into an Endless Simmer Poptail classic that is anything but just  “interesting.”

Melon Berry Diablo Poptail

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Peanut Butter and Jell-WHY?!? Vodka

By this point in my Endless Simmer career (and let’s face it, my career as a human being in general), I have become the go-to girl when it comes to crazy/ridiculous/ill-fated novelty alcoholic endeavors. (Well, to be fair, this honor is shared with my booze soulmate, ML.)

So it should come as no shock that when Van Gogh wanted to send us a bottle of its new PEANUT BUTTER AND JELLY FLAVORED VODKA to sample, I was the first (and only) writer to jump at the chance to experience such a creation. I didn’t have the highest of hopes for it, but come on, I never really have dreams of glory for any of my drunken experiences. All I hope for are entertaining stories we can retell in the future. And by “entertaining” I mean “humiliating,” but whatever.

My roommates and I decided to throw together a last-minute “flavored vodka tasting party” (classy) to poll people on the PB&J vodka. As one might imagine, the reactions were not the most positive. Don’t get me wrong, I love vodka. I love peanut butter and jelly sandwiches. But something seems a bit…. off about this booze.

Their website describes it as such:

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Endless Poptails: Pomegranate Sex on the Beach

I don’t do this often, but this week I’m going to say: pony up, baby! That is, pony up to the tune of  thriteen bucks for some Pama Pomegranate Flavor liqueur. I generally try to stay mainstream with the booze to keep the cost down on these poptails, but I’m pimping Pama because it’s well deserved and has earned a spot near the front of my bar. Alright, the pantry—I don’t actually have a bar. You would think any place that touts”luxury apartments” would feature a wet bar, but nope, my fancy booze sits edge-to-edge with some not-so fancy stuff like store-brand frosted flakes and oreos.

This week’s Poptail is in response to a request from AnaMarie, who wrote ES saying,  “I need one with sex on the beach pleaseeee! that is my favorite drinK!” Here you go.  . .

That’s sex on the beach using a pineapple body and a pomegranate liqueur instead of  Chambord. If you are wondering why I used raspberries instead of a pomegranate — the latter is out of season here.  If anyone can find pomegranates and makes this with it, please come back and tell the rest of us how you like it. For now, we will be enjoying a sweet and tart blend of fruity goodness shot up with vodka and sweetened by Pama.

Sex on the Beach Poptails

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Order Up!

 

 

Summer is nearing its end, so with that we are filling your orders until the Poptail Series goes into hibernation.

Gimlet on a stick now being served. You asked for it and we’re delivering it in all its icy cold glory. That’s a mixed berry gimlet built on a limeade body. Now that we’ve armed you with the not so secret formula, spread the goodness and get mixing.

While you are getting boozy, we want to know what you want to see get cocktailed into a series next e.g. cupcakes, truffles, brownies. We are open for suggestions. Holla in the comments, we’ll throw your suggestions in the mix along with our staff picks.

Mixed Berry Gimlet

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Dessert for Breakfast: Coconut Raspberry Chocolate Muffins

Coconut and Raspberry Chocolate Muffin

When I’m testing a recipe I pretty much enlist anyone with teeth. That includes my spinach-loving toddler, who somehow doesn’t really like baked sweets. But when these came out of the test oven I got a big pass from him. And for those of us who are tall enough to ride a roller coaster, I can confirm this is a chocolate breakfast affair that you don’t want to pass up.

My judgement is that anything healthier than a donut is OK to eat for breakfast. And to make these even….um…healthier, the muffins are packed with coconut and whole raspberries, so if you eat enough of them you can almost meet your USDA fruit recommendation for the day. How’s that for morning glory!

Coconut Raspberry Chocolate Muffins:

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