Cheflebrity Smörgåsbord: But She Has Sassy Bangs!


Hey, Food Network!  What the hell are you doing?

Far be it from me to tell you how to do your job, but I’m starting to think you blew it with the first episode of The Next Food Network Star.  Did you really start off the season by eliminating the cute, perky blond who identified herself as “Housewife 2.0?”  She appeals to both the guys and the girls!  I just don’t think you have the right mindset.  And by “mindset,” I mean the typical reality show producer technique of keeping contestants around solely because they appeal to the audience and make for plenty of news coverage.  In other words, the reason they kept that marginally-talented Susan Boyle on that British show for so long.  (ZING!)

In other news, we’re running another contest here at Endless Simmer.  Just give us your “last meal on Earth” and you can score some bad-ass Top Chef gear.  I know what you’re thinking…”another contest?!?”  It’s all part of our master plan to run as many contests as your local top-40 radio station. Be sure to stop back next week to nab some tix to the monster truck rally.

Shall we smörg?

A look at the folks on the upcoming Top Chef Masters: Slashfood thinks Kelly Choi could be “the new Padma” and Eat Me Daily wonders who the hell Jay Rayner is (other than an extra from Pirates of the Caribbean, by the looks of it.)

Gordon Ramsay finds out the hard way that Australian women don’t like to be called “pigs.”  Who knew?

Post-jump goodness:  a video podcast worth checking out, some gratuitous meat (and a burger, too) and a new way to get your gambling fix.

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