The ES Chat: John McCain
As you know, the reporting team here at Endless Simmer makes it our business to inform you of the presidential candidates’ food-related platforms and pitfalls. With the general election campaign just around the corner, the ES Editorial Board is still deadlocked on whether to endorse a candidate. While you might suppose our liberal, big-bacon tendencies have us gunning for an Obama-Clinton dream ticket, GOP-er John McCain isn’t letting us take anything for granted.
Despite several decades in the limelight, the 71-year-old senator’s views on foodie issues are still mostly unknown. Luckily, after a pizza-fueled swing through Brooklyn last week, the presumptive Republican nominee agreed to sit down for one of Endless Simmer’s signature g-chat interviews.
Our (imaginary) chat with Johnny Mac touches on his pizza preferences, Top Chef, the Capitol Hill eating scene, and of course, the secrets to a great passion fruit mousse.
BS@ES: Thanks for agreeing to g with us, Senator. Let’s get right down to business. In a visit to Brooklyn earlier this week, you made one of the toughest decisions facing any candidate visiting New York: where to eat pizza. Walk us through your thinking.
MacIsBack2k8: That’s a fair question and I should admit to some indiscretions in my past. Last time I was in New York, my young staffers took me to one of these new-fangled fairy places in Williamsburg. Supposed to be great or something.
BS@ES: Fornino?
MacIsBack2k8: Some crap like that. It’s hard to believe this is what passes for a pie in this day and age. Decent cheese and sauce, but you should see what these people put on their pizza. Truffle oil! Lamb! Pistachios, for crying out loud. In my day, people didn’t call that pizza.
BS@ES: You might say the variety of toppings was a little too liberal?
MacIsBack2k8: Here’s some straight talk for you, BS. When I visited New York in the 70’s, you could get a decent slice on any street corner in all five boroughs. Today, half of this fancy pants garbage they’re serving in Manhattan and Brooklyn doesn’t deserve to wipe my ass. But if you want a true old school pizza - quality sauce, plenty of mozz., and a stand-up crust that makes the perfect fold - you’ll still find it out here in Bay Ridge - which, I might add, also happens to be the most Republican neighborhood in all of Brooklyn. Not a coincidence, I don’t think.
BS@ES: Are you suggesting Republicans make better pizza than Democrats?
MacIsBack2k8: Look, unlike some of my liberal opponents, I don’t make any grandiose claims. All I’m saying is, you go to Soho, the Upper West Side, Park Slope, you get a a pussy little pie with flimsy crust and all kinds of high-falutin toppings. You go to Bay Ridge, Staten Island, even Long Island, you get a slice. That’s what I’m talking about.
BS@ES: What about toppings then, sir? I notice you opted for ‘ronis.
MacIsBack2k8: Brb.
MacIsBack2k8: After consulting with my press secretary, I want to be sure to state on the record that the tastiest pizza in America happens to come from my home state, the great state of Arizona. Spinato’s in Phoenix is a personal fav.
BS@ES: LOL - tasty pizza in Arizona - that’s a good one, Senator. But let’s be serious. I’m headed to D.C. later this month. Any power lunch spots you recommend?
How Wheat It Isn’t
Living in New York, I could care less about skyrocketing gas prices - I can count the number of times I’ve driven a car on on my fingers. And to be honest, I’m about ready for this city’s real estate bubble to burst already (got half a mil? you can be the proud owner of a tiny apartment in the middle of a crappy neighborhood!) But this developing wheat crisis is threatening to hit me where it hurts - in the stomach.
That’s right, the pillars of the New York City food chain are about to topple, because rumor has it pizza is heading up to $3 a slice! But that’s not all - next up: bagels for more than a dollar a pop. And no, that doesn’t include cream cheese.
As a rough estimate, I’d say I eat a bagel for breakfast about 17 days a month, and grab a slice of pizza for lunch or dinner maybe 10 times a month. That means the monthly expenses associated with being a New York City bottom feeder just jumped by about $15. Let’s not even think about pizza bagels, which I can only assume are now going for the price of white truffles.
The reason? Bad weather around the globe has hit wheat crops hard, sending prices through the roof. So let’s start praying for some sunshine, people, because if this starts screwing with wheat thins in any way, I am just going to explode.
That Barack Obama Sure Knows the Key to Our Heart (Hint: It Contains Alcohol)
Can Barack Obama get any cooler?
As we work our way through the Endless Simmer endorsement process, we’re trying very hard to be perfectly non-partisan political analysts and endorse the candidate who will do the most for food issues, but that sweetheart Barack Obama just isn’t making it easy. Not only does the Great Biracial Hope have his own ice cream - it’s from Ben and Jerry’s and the name is a pun, I think I just might be a fan - but now there is Obama beer. Sixpoint Craft Ale (a great local discovery upon moving to Brooklyn) has introduced “Hop Obama.” Here’s the lowdown, via Brownstoner:
“In keeping with the Illinois senator’s unifying theme, the ‘Hop Obama’ is an indefinable ale that doesn’t adhere to traditional style guidelines.” The beer is being offered for a limited time at select bars in New York and Massachusetts, and the 4th Avenue bar Pacific Standard is one of the places that’s scored some kegs. (Ed. Note: Pacific Standard, near my house, is another new and noteworthy find. They have a long rotating selection of rare brews, with a nifty printed menu that describes the attributes of each. Plus they have a blog. Obv. I can get on board with any bar that has a blog.) The bar’s blog notes that “this beer is about hope and a rejection of beer as usual.”
That makes Barry two-for-two on our “What Not to Waste” list. Your move, Hillary.
Hott Links: Has Anyone Heard About this Top Chef Show?
Sorry to hit you with the back-to-back Bravo action, but Top Chef 4 starts in Chi-town this evening, and, hey we’re excited. As always, you can count on ES for all your TC gossip, ramblings, and of course, our world wide web famous Padma Lakshmi photo gallery.
- Bravo has a completely unnecessary and completely amazing “Which Top Chef judge are You?” quiz. I won’t tell you which one I matched up with, but let’s just say “though always graceful and poised, I can be playful when the time is right, and I bring a zest for life to everything I do.”
- There’s only one interesting question in this Grub Street interview with Padma Lakshmi, and it’s the last one.
- Time Out NY has the lowdown on Top Chef 3 winner Hung and his latest restaurant stint in NY (they also explain why he’s wearing a yarmulke).
Photo: Time Out NY
Getting a Chip Off My Shoulder
Eating out Mexican is one of the few true values in New York’s getting-even-more-ridiculous dining scene. Every borough has cheap, genuine, hole-in-the-wall spots like Tulcingo Del Valle in the neighborhood I grew up in.
That’s why I’m supremely disturbed by the emergence of quasi-upscale Mexican restaurants. I’m not saying Mexican people aren’t allowed to be fancy, but um…I still want the cheap, giant portions, of flavorful food. I mean, that’s half the point, right? No one has ever decided on Mexican dinner because they’re not especially hungry. And this fancified Mexcian food scene has brought a truly unwelcome development: chips and salsa that must be paid for. In money. #$!%@!
This will not stand.
Everyone in my new hood, Fort Greene, talks about two Mexican joints: Pequena and Bonita. I’ve eaten at both of these now and they serve decent, if not exciting food that falls short in three crucial aspects:
- Small portions
- Lack of spice
- Served by white people
Basically, everything a Mexican restaurant should not be. Seriously, is this Brooklyn or Kansas? What’s going on here?
But here’s the kicker: both places CHARGE for chips and salsa. This is just untenable. Free chips and salsa is like a golden rule of eating out. It’s half the reason I usually choose Mexican. It is just expected, OK? If I walk into a Mexican restaurant, and don’t get that basket and bowl placed in front of me without laying down an extra $4.50, well, I think you get the point - I won’t be happy. Frank Bruni says an empty wine glass is his version of restaurant hell, well no free chips and salsa is mine.
So I recently ate at a well-reviewed Mexican place in SoHo called Cafe el Portal. This place was pretty cool - teeny underground restaurant, genuine menu, Mexican-owned and operated. Although a little overpriced, it had some crazy dishes I could get behind, like a chile relleno covered in pomegranate seeds. While this inventive menu distracted me for two to three minutes after sitting down, I soon noticed something off. There was just a certain lack of greasiness on my hands and spiciness in my mouth.
