Endless Simmer - A Food Blog

If you live in DC you are most likely familiar with the perpetual long line that forms outside of Pasta Mia, a not so special looking establishment at the corner of 18th and Columbia. For over a year now, the line outside Pasta Mia has baffled me, and also made me insanely curious about the restaurant. Is it that good? I mean people wait in the rain to get into this place!

So I FINALLY went, only because it was gorgeous outside so I wouldn’t mind waiting in line outside. By some chance miracle, my sweetheart Matt(y) (who will blog one of these days) and I were seated immediately.

First impression: Our table was squeezed a little too close for comfort in between two others (like to the point that we were just sharing olive oil with the table to the left of us).

Second impression: Call it an authority issue, but I hate going to places with rules. Like, I am paying you for a service, I should not have to be following rules here! The first annoying rule was that they only accept cash, so I had to leave to go to the ATM. And it’s not like this place is cheap- I mean we each had one glass of house wine and a pasta dish and it was 40 bucks without tip. The second rule I discovered was through an elderly couple sitting to the right of us (so basically at our table). They were so cute, and all they wanted was to split a salad and a pasta dish, because they knew the portions were HUGE. The waitress said she’d have to charge them for two entrees if they did that! WHAAAA! So they ended up just getting their own.

After the jump, the stunning third, fourth and final conclusions of Pasta Mia

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No One Puts Cupcakes in a Corner takes the cake in last week’s Who Cooked It Better, racking up 61 percent of the vote for her dark chocolate bacon cupcake.

With Mother’s Day around the corner, I thought it would be fun to explore that ultimate brunch food, Eggs Benedict. Searching around the Interwebs for creative Eggs Benedict recipes was an appetite-whetting endeavour indeed, and I am just about ready to take a bath in egg yolk right now.

Of course, you can’t get too creative with the way you prepare this dish, as there are only so many ways to poach an egg, and hollandaise sauce is complex enough that it shouldn’t be trifled with. But here are four recipes that offer cool alternatives to the traditional Eggs Benedict. Yes, I know, getting creative makes it technically not Eggs Benedict, but these four recipes sound delicious, plus they are all friggin beautiful.

The recipe on the top left is from Jamie over at Cheese ‘N Things. Her “Eggs Jamie” has tastiness piled so high that hollandaise sauce seems unnecessary. The poached eggs are served on a bed of balsamic-upped arugula, which is mixed with crispy prosciutto and shavings of parmagiano reggiano, and the whole thing is topped with caramelized red onions. I love how instead of going for the money shot (runny yolk everywhere), she presents the egg just as it’s ready to burst. So much anticipation. Full recipe here.

The top right dish is from Julie of the Dinner with Julie blog, who, as you might gather, is chronicling a year in her kitchen. (Aside: Check out her bageleggs - how cool is that?) Julie’s Benedict uses a crabcake as a base instead of the muffin, and puts a cool spin on the hollandaise sauce with a lightened lemon-basil recipe. Complete recipe here.

The bottom-left Benedict is the traditionalist version, although it does make me think - I have never been served Eggs Benedict with a beautiful thick slice of Country Ham like Closet Cooking dishes up here. Usually you can barely taste the puny slice of Canadian bacon under the runny egg yolk and hollandaise, but this hunk of ham really completes the dish. Now this is one version that pays respect to the pig. Recipe here.

I stumbled upon this last photo over at Noshtalgia, who is noshtalgizing about “Italian Eggs Benedict” and points us to Lucahjin’s stream on flickr. Lucahjin put together this simple/genius creation - a poked poached egg swimming in a pool of tomato sauce and chickpeas. Brilliant!

So….

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Photos: Cheese ‘N Things, Dinner with Julie, Closet Cooking, Flickr user Lucahjin.

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While DC will never achieve the greatness of New York/New Jersey pizza, it does produce a quality wood-fired version at Sette Osteria. The restaurant, with floor-to-ceiling windows facing busy Connecticut Avenue, is a good choice for those craving Italian carbs. Its version of bruschetta is more like a salad, with heaps of arugula and cherry tomatoes piled high on one piece of grilled bread, which makes this usually sharable appetizer difficult to split. That’s okay, though - it’s too good to split. Arugula salad with shaved fennel and pecorino shavings, tossed with lemon vinaigrette, is large enough for a light lunch with a refreshing crunch. Ai peperoni e melanzane, a pie topped with smoked mozzarella, eggplant, and roasted bell peppers, will satisfy your needs for a savory, smoky, slightly charred pizza.
For: Getting your Italian fill on this side of the Atlantic.
Entrees: $9-$19. 202-483-3070. 1666 Connecticut Ave, NW

Originally in the Onion - AV Club / DC local edition

Photo: Sette Osteria

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One of the amazing/frustrating thing about getting into food is realizing how many different things there are to be snobby about. Yes, of course you must have your favorite pinot noir, form an opinion on whether putting cheese on seafood is acceptable, and decide if you think using truffle oil is cheating.

But then you realize you also have to know which butter you prefer (a premium one for bread and a basic one for baking, please), which goat cheese is the best, and the difference betwee sea salt and kosher salt.

One thing that I never thought to be snobby about is pasta. It’s so cheap and simple that it just never occurred to me. Sure, I’m aware that eating a freshly-made bowl of linguine while relaxing on a balcony in Naples is preferably to the daily special at the Olive Garden, but when it comes to buying the dried stuff, the toughest thing I ever thought about was whether I felt like wagon wheels or elbows.

Until now.

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No, that’s not the skeeziest craigslist roommate ad of all time, it’s merely the submission guidelines for Playboy’s newest themed pictorial “Girls of the Olive Garden.”

And this isn’t a joke, apparently the men’s mag has run out of college conferences to profile and has turned to everyone’s favorite purveyor of free breadsticks to find America’s next top nude model.

The inspiration for the contest is a woman named Kendra Wilkinson, whose illustrious life accomplishments include her roles as one of Hugh Hefner’s pretend girlfriends; and as runner-up to Shar Jackson on MTV’s Celebrity Rap Superstar. Shar Jackson, for the record, is Britney Spears’ ex-husband’s baby mama (and she’s a rap superstar, but you knew that).

And, Kendra’s a blogger! You see, Kendra’s mom is a former Philadelphia Eagles cheerleader and a proud resident of Cherry Hill, New Jersey, which qualifies Kendra to blog about the Eagles.

With the Hef pushing 83, Kendra is apparently pulling the shots over at Playboy, and because she loves the Olive Garden more than life itself, she’s decided to feature their waitresses in a pictorial that is totally not endorsed by the restaurant chain (although NY Post reports they won’t fire their employees if they pose).

After the jump, Kendra explains what it takes to make it as a girl of the O.G.

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I’ve told you all plenty of times about chiles rellenos, the spicy stuffed peppers that are probably my fav Mexican dish. I’ve shown you my attempts at both pork and cheese chiles rellenos, and as I mentioned in our cake discussion earlier this week, I went for another round this weekend (but figured you guys didn’t need to see Version 3.0). However, it got me thinking about ways I could mix this dish up, and hence a brand new and improved version.

When Alex and I went shopping for poblanos (the peppers used in CRs) the ones they had were pretty small and miserable. We bought a couple of those, but just to be safe also grabbed two frying peppers - frying peppers is what ACME supermarket in Bryn Mawr, Pennsylvania calls them, I think they were Anaheim peppers, although I could be wrong.

Hey look what I just found while searching for info on types of peppers: Anaheim peppers are the chiles most often used to make chiles rellenos. Haha, who knew? Well they turned out well, which makes sense if they really are the kind you are supposed to use. Kinda random how that worked out.

But it got me thinking, why not make chiles rellenos with other types of peppers? Roasted red bell peppers happen to be among my very favorite foods, so I had the idea to make an Italian-ized version of CRs using red bells and savory Italian cheeses and spices instead of the spicy Mexican ones usually used. I know there are already plenty of ways to make Italian stuffed peppers, but I’ve never seen it done with roasted reds. Forgive me if I’m taking credit for something that I didn’t actually discover.

Full r after the j.

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It’s an urban legend among roommate disaster stories. Roommate #1 goes to neighborhood takeout joint. Orders smelliest thing on menu. Brings home, consumes half during Lost marathon, puts in fridge. Roommate #2 comes home, sniffs something rank, assumes rotten meat in fridge, throws out stinky leftovers. Passive aggressive notes ensue. Roommate tension escalates. Both move out. And it all started with a smelly dish.

DC has many choices of incredibly smelly, yet unbelievably tasty takeout. Everyone has come across this fare in some form. It’s the food with the stench that is embedded in your car during the five minute drive from the curry shop to your couch (car fresheners don’t come in Lamb Korma). The meal that when consumed at the desk causes coworkers’ eyes to water. The food that may smell better coming out than going in. But in the battle between taste buds and nose, taste triumphs. Meet the pungent posse of yummy DC takeout food.

Honorable Mention: O Jing A Bukom, Adam Express
This nondescript takeout place in Mt. Pleasant may look like any of the many forgettable Chinese joints that dot the DC landscape (sorry YUMS and Dannys). But one step inside this place and you are greeted with an extensive Korean menu, smiling owners, and the succulent stench of food. While everything in this tasty hole-in-the-wall has an aroma, only the daring need to order the stinkiest of all smelly foods: O Jing A Bukom. Broiled squid and vegetables sautéed in a spicy sauce with an odor more ferocious than the villain in Twenty Thousand Leagues. But man, is it good. The fresh chili spicy sauce is the perfect accompaniment to the perfectly grilled seafood. If the squid isn’t malodorous enough, Adam Express kindly includes a side of Kimchi (pickled cabbage) to raise the smelly stakes.
Adam Express, 3211 Mt Pleasant St NW, Washington, DC 20010, (202) 328-0010

4th Place: Garlic Knots, Valentino’s, Alexandria
New York pizza enthusiasts love Valentino’s for its authentic pies. But look beyond the main course for an appetizer that will surely singe the senses. This adored takeout joint takes pizza dough and bakes it with herbs, spices, olive oil, and Kilimanjaro-size mountain of garlic. Valentino’s creation heads a thousand knots into Garlic Land (Candyland’s much less profitable successor). The flavor is perfectly spiced, fragrant goodness, and the bread is warm and generously greasy, but the fumes give off a garlic sauna. Perfect for John Carpenter or Vampire Weekend fans, or for one of the Coreys in The Lost Boys. Not at all good for first dates.
Valentino’s, 4813 Beauregard St, Alexandria, VA 2232, (703) 354-8383

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It’s come to our attention here at ES that despite all these food blogs, there are only so many things a person can actually cook. I mean, it takes a lot of hard work to come up with an original, tasty combination of ingredients, and even when you do, chances are someone’s already thought of it before anyway. Just ask Jessica Seinfeld. So what’s a snarky food blogger to do? Why, judge others of course. On that note we introduce our newest feature: Who Cooked It Better?

Inspired by Us Weekly’s in-depth examination of celebrity costumery, Who Wore It Best? we’ll be browsing the food world each week to bring you a head-to-head match-up in which you, the readers, get to decide Who Cooked It Better?

It’s only fitting that our first culinary clash is a fishfight between the Food Network’s two sultriest chefs. Anyone can wrap a simple broiled scallop in bacon and make it taste pretty great, but not everyone can produce the beautiful succulence that is emitted by Rachael Ray and Giada De Laurentiis on a daily basis.

Pictured in the left-hand corner is the entry from our first cheftestant, the New York-born, former Macy’s candy counter clerk and aspiring queen of all media, Rachael Ray. Thankfully, RayRay resisted the urge to make an entreetizer or stoup this time and went semi-classic with her scallops, which are marinated in Teriyaki sauce, wrapped in thickly-sliced bacon and served on a tantalizing toothpick. Rachael gets creativity points for adding a slice of water chestnut and piece of pickled ginger to each scallop. Full recipe here.

In the right corner is our challenger, Rome-born, Hollywood-raised brand new baby mama Giada De Laurentiis. Giada went for a refreshing take here, blending up a tomato-basil-olive oil rub for her scallops, and kicking it up a notch by wrapping them in prosciutto. These scrumptious shellfish look pretty gushingly gourmet on their bed of fresh arugula, although perhaps a little hard to handle. Full recipe here.

So, dear readers, your thoughts please…

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Living in New York, I could care less about skyrocketing gas prices - I can count the number of times I’ve driven a car on on my fingers. And to be honest, I’m about ready for this city’s real estate bubble to burst already (got half a mil? you can be the proud owner of a tiny apartment in the middle of a crappy neighborhood!) But this developing wheat crisis is threatening to hit me where it hurts - in the stomach.

That’s right, the pillars of the New York City food chain are about to topple, because rumor has it pizza is heading up to $3 a slice! But that’s not all - next up: bagels for more than a dollar a pop. And no, that doesn’t include cream cheese.

As a rough estimate, I’d say I eat a bagel for breakfast about 17 days a month, and grab a slice of pizza for lunch or dinner maybe 10 times a month. That means the monthly expenses associated with being a New York City bottom feeder just jumped by about $15. Let’s not even think about pizza bagels, which I can only assume are now going for the price of white truffles.

The reason? Bad weather around the globe has hit wheat crops hard, sending prices through the roof. So let’s start praying for some sunshine, people, because if this starts screwing with wheat thins in any way, I am just going to explode.

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