Fowl - - Page 16

by gansie

And On Wednesday She Cooked Two Dinners

Monday night I went to Belmont‘s book club meeting where she served an African-inspired hearty, pureed, spicy (canned) squash soup. It was the color of puke but was absolutely wonderful. Perfect for a cold, winter night. All of the bookies are waiting for her to post the semi-elaborate recipe. I do know, however, that she spiked the soup with red wine and whiskey. And right there I vowed to myself to abuse 80’s liquor cabinet on behalf of our meals, kinda like this truffle amazingness. A selfless host indeed, Belmont took the time to shake up a blood orange vinaigrette and a salad full of fresh spinach and blood orange segments and the bitch doesn’t even like fruit. She’s a real crowd pleaser. Plus the from-scratch vanilla pudding.

So that was Monday.

Tuesday I attended a press dinner at the very new Inox. It was all the way out in Tysons so I was <this close> to not trekking out there. But, good lord, I’m glad I sacrificed some oil for the tasting dinner:

endive salad with blood orange (two salads with blood orange in two days!) paired with the creamiest nugget of bleu cheese – and I hate that usually funky shit;
red snapper in a lively ginger-lemongrass curry bouillon which also had beautiful indigo colored-basil seeds floating around – had a great, and surprising, kick;
lobster, glorious lobster;
pink slices of pan seared duck downed with bites of artichoke, fennel, olives and sun dried tomato;
crispy, meaty skate wing and a pudgy scallop;
elderflower soup which scared the shit out of me because it looked exactly like a jellyfish (did anyone else get forced to watch seven pounds??);
a chocolate bread pudding with – GET THIS – kalamata olive oil sherbert infused in the creaminess. First you receive traditional chocolate, but then it’s salty, and tangy, and briny and holy shit it tastes like an olive, but there is no olive, just the essence of an olive. It’s a real trick on your brain. A beautiful trick that I would gladly fall for again;
fruity, light, juicy pineapple dessert, but I couldn’t keep my tongue away from the chocolate-oliveness;
ended with petits fours;
lots of wine throughout served by the cockiest, driest sommelier I’ve ever encountered. His demeanor was actually refreshing compared to the normal ass kissing wine expert. He was still kinda a dick though. But only in the nicest possible way.

So that was Tuesday. And sorry, Amy, for taking the LONG way home.

Anyway, I was tired from two nights out, plus I’d been living with a cold for the past few days, and I was excited to get back into the kitchen. It’s funny how much I missed it there. And this is how I know I’m really crazy. You know how everyone is like, oh, I only want to make one meal, one meal in one pot, something easy on a week night. Well, I like cooking so much that I enjoy making 80 and I different dinners. They’re usually similar in scope, but contain different ingredients.

Here goes crazy.

From the ES Inbox…

Fwd: Chicken Fried Bacon

Jrod: Dipping that in the sausage gravy makes my mouth water.

Gansie: no.

BS: Yes!

The beautiful, greasy details about our fav new discovery:

Our Kind of Oscars: Top 10 Movie Food Moments

Another year, another Oscars ceremony coming up, and still no category for Best Use of Food In a Motion Picture. Where is the justice? Ever since the great Charlie Chaplin made a couple of dinner rolls dance in The Gold Rush, food has elevated the cinema to its greatest moments. From James Cagney taking out his aggression on a grapefruit to Willy Wonka’s fantasy land of sweets, food has helped film portray the full range of human emotions. So instead of watching 4 hours of Hollywood self-congratulation this weekend, spend a few minutes checking out the Top 10 Movie Food Moments.

10. “Elwood and I will come here for breakfast, lunch, and dinner.” – The Blues Brothers

Chez Paul was apparently a real restaurant in Chicago. The version of it they used in The Blues Brothers (they built a replica of the interior for filming) was also the perfect example of the too-fussy French restaurant just asking to be taken down a few pegs. And so, when Jake and Elwood go looking for maitre d’ Alan “Mr. Fabulous” Rubin to fill out their brass section, we know something good is going to happen, and we get the visceral thrill of getting to see them overturn the applecart. One shrimp cocktail, a few glasses of champagne, a failed attempt to purchase a woman and child and a very young Pee-Wee Herman later, and they’re off on the next leg of their Mission from God.

9. Jack Just Wants his Toast – Five Easy Pieces

There’s ordering toast, and then there’s ordering toast the Jack Nicholson way. This 1970 drama was nominated for 4 Oscars, but who can remember anything about it, other than Jacko telling the poor waitress to “hold it between your knees?” The moral of the story: If Jack ever walks into your restaurant, just give him his goddamn plain white toast.

8. Late Night Dinner at Mrs. Scorsese’s – Goodfellas

Mob movies and Italian food go together like meatballs and red gravy. So when it comes time to pick the greatest food scene from a Mafia flick, we’re going to leave the cannoli and take a scene from Marty’s masterpiece, GoodFellas. Although the description of one of the incarcerated gangsters preparing a full Italian feast (complete with razor-sliced garlic in the sauce) is tempting, we have to go with a late night stop at Tommy DeVito’s mother’s place in order to pick out some tools to finish a…business transaction. But what Italian mother would let her son and his friends leave without making sure the boys are well-fed? Oh, and that late-night home cook? Played by Martin Scorsese’s mom.

7. A Chef’s Breakfast – Big Night

A lyrical food movie, with Louis Prima playing the Godot role. Of all of the Italian cuisine featured throughout the film, it’s a simple scene toward the end that captures all you need to know about a chef’s love and respect for food. The next morning, after the climactic feast, a simple egg is cooked on screen, in one take. And you get the feeling that, while the chefs cook the fancy dishes for the punters in the dining room, the true connoisseur can appreciate something so basic. The clip above is from an Italian copy of the movie, but the scene has so few words, it really doesn’t matter. The movie is made all the more satisfying if you know that star Stanley Tucci is a major foodie and F.O.M. (Friend of Mario)

6. In Space No One Can Hear Your Chest Explode – Alien

Bilbo over there has been acting really suspicious lately. And Kane had a run-in with that thing, but he’s been feeling better lately. Maybe things are looking up…you and your buddies get to kick back and enjoy a meal and a few laughs. What could possibly go wrong? Oh, shit!

Next: Top 5 Movie Food Moments

in Celebs / Eggs / Fowl / Lists 40 comments

by BS

Top 10 All-Time George W. Bush Food Moments

As you may or may not have heard, Barack H. Obama is set to be sworn in as the 44th President of the United States this week (it’s kind of flown under the radar). I’ve been as guilty as anyone of getting caught up in all the hype surrounding our leader/savior/superhero, but it’s just occurred to me that while we’ve all been focused on how freaking unbelievable and amazing it is that Barack Obama is actually going to be President in ONE DAY, we’ve completely overlooked another monumental milestone: As of tomorrow, George W. Bush will not be president. O. M. G.

And while it’s been apparent for some time now that W. is just as eager as the rest of us for his last day in office to come, in a recent intimate interview, Bush admitted there is one thing he’ll miss about leaving the White House: The free food. To honor that spirit, we’re taking a fond look back at the Top 10 All-Time George W. Bush Food Moments. The choking, the burping, the eating with his mouth full, it’s been quite a presidency. I never thought the day would come when I’d say this, but as a writer always eager for an easy target — Dubya, I’m gonna miss ya.

10. TurkeyGate

Thanksgiving 2003: President Bush made one his gutsiest moves ever, a secret decision to fly into war-torn Baghdad and personally congratulate the troops on their “Mission Accomplished,” surprising the boys and girls with a beautiful golden turkey. Alas, that gorgeous bird, like so much else about this administration, turned out to be fake. Washington Post reporters uncovered the truth: the glossy turkey was just for show, rigged up for the prez — by who else? an overpaid government contractor — and our brave men and women in uniform were actually served cafeteria-style slop.

9. “We gotta get Hezbollah to stop doin’ this shit…are you gonna eat that?”

When you think about it, you can’t really blame George Bush for all his gaffes. The poor guy ran for President in 1999, how was he supposed to know some geeks were about to invent a magical program called YouTube that would record and broadcast his every awkward move and stupid sentence for the next eight years? Well unfortunately for him, they did. And unfortunately for America, the cameras were there at this G-8 meeting in 2006 to catch George artfully explaining the Bush doctrine to Tony Blair…while cursing up a storm…with his mouth full. Stay classy, GWB.

8. Sir, that is Not a Corn Dog

One of the shear joys of American politics is observing the quadrennial rite of presidential candidate trekking out to Iowa to seduce those cornfed voters the only way they know how — by chowing down on their food. But Bushie one-upped all the panderers in August 2004 when he took a campaign swing through Davenport, Iowa and stopped to marvel at their beautiful sweet corn. Apparently unaware that raw sweet corn is generally fed only to livestock, George ripped open an ear and dug in. “Mmm,” George proclaimed. “You don’t even have to cook it.” Actually you do, George. But please don’t — we shudder at the thought of you getting anywhere near an open flame.

7. Bad Sushi

OK, maybe we can’t blame the guy for the food sins of his father, but seriously America, how did you even consider electing a second Bush after the first one THREW UP on the Japanese President?!? Not an urban legend, this actually happened. Your entire family should really be banned from international diplomacy after you do this once.

6. Jenna and Tonic

As long as we’re celebrating the extended family, how could one leave out dear Jenna? The saga of the blond twin’s White House years started early, when the 19-year-old first daughter tried to use a fake ID to buy a margarita at a Mexican restaurant in Austin, Texas. And Jenna didn’t stop there. From falling down drunk to jaunting off on south-of-the-border boozefests to TJ arranged by the Secret Service, she was so amusing she almost made this administration tolerable. And here’s the scary part: After all that, it turns out Jenna is the sensible one in the family.

Next: Top 5 All-Time George W. Bush Food Moments

in Fowl / Lists / Politics 14 comments

by BS

Endless Thanks

Ah, so many things to be thankful for this year. But mostly the gift to humor that is Sarah Palin. If you haven’t seen her turkey “pardon” video yet, it’s a must-see. Although give it a pass if you’re a veggie or other squemish type – don’t say I didn’t warn you.

in Fowl / Holiday / Politics 3 comments

by BS

T Minus One

Holy turkeys! The big day is almost here. But don’t freak out, ES has oodles of advice as always. If you weren’t inspired by our Meaty Thanksgiving, Candy Thanksgiving, Elitist Thanksgiving, or even Procrastinator’s Thanksgiving, check out some of our slightly more serious ideas from last year, including:

Maple ginger glazed turkey from 80P’s Mom (see comments)
80P’s super-simple sweet potato recipe
BS’s butternut squash with portobellos, walnuts and feta
BSister’s julienne root vegetable salad
A thing only Jersey could create: the turkey bagel
And we can always count on britannia for a decadent thanks-gay-ing.

in Fowl / Holiday / Veggie 0 comments

by gansie

Endless Menus: A Procrastinator’s Thanksgiving

Holy Poop! It’s the Monday before Thanksgiving and you ain’t got shit ready. Totally no worries, dude. ES isn’t only about meals made for foodie snots, we’re also here to help you, the procrastinating omnivore. Here’s a quick and dirty guide to help you throw together a totally cheating Thanksgiving dinner.

The Frozen Dinner

There is nothing more lovely that an elegantly set table: white linen tablecloth, delicately rolled cloth napkins, votives encircling a centerpiece of brightly colored gourds and large china dinner plates on top of gunmetal chargers. And if you set that scene, no one will ever notice that everyone has been served their own Lean Cuisine. ES recommends their Roast Turkey frozen dinner:

Tender slices of roasted turkey tenderloins in a traditional gravy with stuffing,whipped potatoes and green beans accented with cranberries

And at a mere 250 calories, no one has to feel bad snacking on that store-bought pumpkin pie. (Photo: Freezer Burned)

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