Jell-O Goes Naughty

Jell-O has a new product – and apparently it’s R-rated. Jell-O Temptations. As Kraft (who own Jell-O) describes on their website, “Enjoy the naughty taste of new TEMPTATIONS by JELL-O with 150 well-behaved calories or less.” Damn! This Jell-O is so naughty it needs a spanking.

But how can Jell-O protect the innocence of children but still market their saucy, naughty little product to adults? Kraft’s new marketing tool, a vending machine that dispenses product samples to adults only, addresses this issue. Free Jell-O Temptations for adults ONLY!!!

So how does the machine differentiate between children and adults? They use a simultaneously creepy and cool feature developed by Kraft and Intel that uses a facial recognition sensor on the machine to determine the age of the user. A camera scans your face and measures the distance between your facial features to determine age.

I don’t have anything against children — in fact sometimes I even like them — but why should they always get the free cookie? I think Jell-O’s new marketing campaign is brilliant, and I’ll tell you why. I previously had absolutely no interest whatsoever in trying a Jell-O Temptations pudding mousse — in fact I detest Jell-O in every form (the food wiggles and MOVES ON ITS OWN – so wrong) — but here I am talking about it, extolling the virtues of a vending machine that yells at children. A vending machine that yells at children?! YES! Well it doesn’t exactly yell, but it beeps loudly and flashes this screen:

Take a look at the little girl’s reaction – around the 40 second mark:

I think she’s saying, “That’s cold!” Jell-O aside, this machine promises hours of amazing people-watching if you can find one near you. And how will Kraft know if consumers are enjoying their product? They plan to increase the camera’s sensing abilities to read emotions. Jose Avalos, the retail director for Intel told USA Today, “We want to see if a person is smiling after they receive their sample.” Their naughty, naughty sample.