Friday Fuck Ups: Bad Avocados?
Just look at that lovely picture above. Go ahead, I’ll wait.
I know you are thinking to yourself, what is something like that doing on Friday Fuck Ups? How could something fried suck so much? Add the fact that what is inside that fried oil casing is avocado and feta cheese.
Hate to break your collective hearts, but these were downright terrible. The complete sad tale after the jump.
This all began several months back with a moment of inspiration that deserved a light bulb over my head if anything ever has. “What if we fry up some avocado balls?!?” I blurted to Gansie. Her eyes lit up, the scheming began. Avocado is pretty sticky I reasoned, bread crumbs should stick nicely. Gansie had a great idea to add some feta, as she loves to do with her guacamole.
When the time came to actually turn our invention into reality, we went with panko mixed with salt and pepper, and egg (see below)
Just like breading anything else, we balled the avocado, brushed with egg, and covered in panko. In the end, the egg was really unnecessary, as the panko stuck just fine to the alligator pear on its own.
After a 2 minute bath in boiling hot oil, they were crispy and we were ready to gorge.
Well, they were crispy on the outside. Word to the wise, there is a reason guacamole is served cold. Warm avocado is gross. It looks like the slime they dumped on those kids in Double Dare. It probably tastes about the same, too. Try as we might (I still ate about 4), we could not save them. Spritz with lemon? Better, but now just a tangy taste before the creamy green goo. Chilling in the fridge over night? No change, no cold and creamy.
In the end, we threw them out, consoling ourselves with the knowledge that at least we had our next Friday Fuck Up post.
That’s sad – every year, I go to the Austin City Limits Music Festival in Texas and look forward to one particular booth in the food court they have there. It’s from a local restaurant called Hudson’s on the Bend and they have – get this – Deep Fried Avocado Cones…It’s a tortilla, rolled kinda wrap-style with some slaw at the bottom with a few fried avocado wedges, and then some kind of spicy (chipotle maybe??) sauce drizzled on top. Tastiest thing EVER. I don’t know how they can do it, but they do….I look forward to those cones as much as I do the music, believe it or not…
oh that is so sad! they look goddamn beautiful and I was floored by the idea…I can’t believe they weren’t good – I’m actually getting mad
Interesting Molly. I knew there had to be someone out there doing this. Can always count on Texas when frying foods, or drinks. Time for an investigation…
I’m wondering if you just left the avocados in chunks, instead of mashing into guac? I’ve put avocado in hot soup before and it holds up well, and doesn’t have weirdness due to heat. And it sounds like the TX yumminess is in larger pieces.
Just a thought.
Well it was a good try! At least they look lovely.
you silly child, 80p. Anybody who started watching Nickelodeon during the Reagan years knows that green slime started on “you can’t do that on television”
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6QbhfbLUtQs
so depressing. i mean, how could avocado do this to me!
i’m with el and molly–i bet it would be better to bread and fry avocado wedges–sorry gans, no feta that way. hot guac is bad news, as anyone who has tried to reheat their mexican food in the microwave without removing guac first has learned.
yeah this really makes me sad – I’ve been looking foward to knowing the results of this wonderful idea!!! My thoughts are truly with you
this makes me sad! i love your blog by the way!